


Singing him song

by Flamme19



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, Angry Rick Grimes, Angst, BAMF Carl Grimes, Consensual Underage Sex, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, First Time, Getting Together, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Negan Being Negan (Walking Dead), Protective Negan (Walking Dead), Season/Series 07, Time Skips, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-02
Updated: 2020-06-21
Packaged: 2021-03-02 07:56:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage
Chapters: 15
Words: 21,768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23967991
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Flamme19/pseuds/Flamme19
Summary: In the face of the deadly threat, Carl has one thing to do - sing or die."I want you sing me a song.",,No...."
Relationships: Carl Grimes/Negan
Comments: 33
Kudos: 119





	1. Chapter 1

"Do you like music?"  
Carl was silent, staring at the carpet on the floor. There was a moment of silence in the room.  
"I want you to sing me a song."  
Carl looked up in confusion and looked at Negan, who grinned at him. He was still playing with a baseball bat in his hands.  
,,What?"  
"You heard me. You killed two of my guys outside with a fucking submachine gun. So I want something in return for you. Some song. "  
"I ... I can't think of any now," Carl muttered, confused, his gaze darting to the bat in Negan's hands.  
"Bullshit!" Negan growled, and Carl crouched involuntarily. "What did your mother sing to you at home?" What was dad playing in the car? ”  
Carl had an absolute emptiness in his head. But before he could think of an answer, the wire-wrapped end of a bat appeared in front of his face.  
"Start singing."  
Carl looked up at the bats and looked into Negan's eyes. Wasn't it enough what he forced him to do? Take off the bandage, listen to all the shit Negan said here? A wave of defiance rose in Carl.  
He no longer wanted to listen to another person who knew what was best for him or wanted to tell him what and where and when to do. He had enough of this apocalypse since the beginning. Dad, mom, Shane, Daryl, the people around him.  
,,No..."  
,,Excuse me? I must have heard fucking badly, but that fucking sounded like a rejection ... "  
Carl swallowed hard and returned Negan's angry look.  
,,Exactly. If you want to kill me, do it. But I won't make a fool of you here. "  
There was a heavy silence in the room. At any moment, Carl expected a blow to the bat that would end his miserable life. Instead, Negan began to laugh out loud.  
"You really have those balls, boy, and they're fucking big."  
"I'm not a boy," Carl snapped, his hands clenched into fists.  
,,Really? Fucking interesting. You're spitting on me here. But you won't tell your daddy anything, will you? You listen to him like a dog, you run after him whenever he whistles. Is that what you want from life? ”  
"That's not true!" Carl shouted in panic. "I'm not his dog! He's my dad! ”  
,,Really? You almost lost your hand because of him during our first meeting. Just because your damn father couldn't lower his head and accept the truth. Do you want to die like this? Somewhere on the fucking dirty floor, dying because your dad is an asshole? Or do you want to take care of yourself? ”  
"It's not just about what I want," Carl said weakly, Negan's words in his head playing like annoying music over and over.  
God, Negan was right. He almost lost his hand, thanks only to his dad. And he was almost willing to give up that hand. All this for my father's vision of what was right.  
Carl lowered his head. He could feel tears streaming down his cheeks. Then a hand in a black leather glove wiped his face gently.  
"What do you want, Carl?" Just you, for yourself? ”  
"I ... I want to be taken seriously," Carl whispered softly.  
"And why should they take you seriously?" Negan asked.  
Carl raised his head rebelliously. In Negan's gaze, however, he found no ridicule, only an honest question.  
"What the hell do you mean?"  
Negan sat down on the sofa and set the bat next to him.  
"What did you do to make others respect you? Respect is not something you can cry or beg for. You have to prove to others that you are worth respecting. I can show you what it looks like. After all, it's time. "  
Carl looked up in confusion.  
"Time for what?"  
"Iron."

Everyone was kneeling. Young, old, men, women. All. And only because Negan came.  
Carl watched in horror as Negan spoke as an unknown man was tied to a chair, waiting for God to know what. Carl had seen a lot in his life. But as soon as Negan pressed the red-hot iron to the other man's face, he felt sick. He waited for someone to do something, step in. He saw disagreement in the eyes of others. But they were all silent and watching silently.  
Daryl was silent, too. For Carl, Daryl was always someone who fought to the last breath. But here he stood, with a mop in his hand, looking at the ground.  
"I know it looks like pretty crazy shit," Negan nodded, leaning closer. "But I wanted to show you what real respect looks like."  
Negan took Carl by the shoulders, leading him out of the hall. Carl saw relief in the eyes of the others that Negan was finally leaving. The doctor went to the man in a chair, several of Negan's wives crying nearby.  
But no one did or said anything.

They returned to Negan's bedroom. Carl thought all the way about what he saw. The first thought was disgusting. The man was maimed for the rest of his life. Just for breaking some fancy rules? But Carl couldn't get the thought of how easily everyone listened. They knelt down. It was clear to Carl that most did not agree with what had happened. But something is forced to stand still, because of this they decided not to save the man.  
Respect.  
"Everything is measured here with respect," Negan said, as if he could read Carl's thoughts. "It doesn't matter who you are. One of my best is a woman. Some are young, some are old. As long as you are useful and have something to offer, you are welcome. Only by what you do will you gain respect. "  
"My family respects me," Carl said unnecessarily.  
Negan's smirk was enough of an answer.  
"Don't sell yourself so cheap, Carl," Negan said softly, his face suddenly serious. "You're a smart boy. Fighter. You managed to survive things that others would fucking go crazy with. Don't hide behind a piece of bandage to keep pretending you're a normal young boy. I see it in you. "  
Carl swallowed softly, unable to take his eyes off Negan's stare.  
"I don't know what to do," Carl finally admitted quietly.  
"Take life into your own hands. Where you are now, that place is chocking you. It will kill you. Here, the future awaits you exactly as you will. "  
Stay with Negan? How would he explain that to dad? He would never be able to understand the feeling of emptiness that Carl sometimes felt inside himself. He would not agree.  
But did Carl need his consent?  
"I can't just leave ..."  
"You can do whatever you fucking want," Negan said, sitting closer. "You can go and change the world. I believe that if anyone can do it, it will be you. "  
Carl didn't remember the last time anyone had such confidence in him. And without the conditions of how he was supposed to do it.  
"Okay ... I'll stay a while ... On the condition that I can leave at any time! And you won't use it against dad! "  
Negan smiled.  
"I wouldn't even think about it ... Come on, let's go for a ride. We have a job in Alexandria. "


	2. Chapter 2

,,Where will we go?"  
Negan straightened his jacket and picked up his bat.  
"Let's go visit. You have to pack something and besides, there should be a lot of nice things waiting for me. I hope your dad keeps his word. "  
Carl rose mechanically from his chair and headed for the door. Until the sound of his name stopped him.  
"Carl ... You forgot this ..."  
Carl turned and looked at Negan, who was holding a bandage in his hand. He couldn't realize how he could forget that. He usually counted down the seconds until he could tie his face again.  
But it was old Carl.  
"I don't want it anymore," Carl said quickly, as if afraid he would change his mind.  
Laughing, Negan threw the bandage on the floor and took Carl by the shoulders.  
"You're just making me happy ... Come on, let's put people together and go to nature."

The journey was in a spirit of silence. Negan spoke a hundred miles an hour, but Carl barely noticed the other man. He could only concentrate on being pressed into Negan. They were sitting in front with another Savior, and the car was not made for three. Carl tried to keep his balance. But Negan's scent and the power of his close presence could relieve him reliably.  
Carl knew he might have been too hasty. Throw away everything he had. To see that he will be respected by a bunch of killers. The truth, however, was that even a bunch of murderers was a better option for Carl than no one.

Immediately upon arrival, Carl went to their house. He passed Olivia as soon as he greeted her. However, Olivia stopped him at the stairs.  
"Carl, where have you been? Aren't you with Rick? ”  
"You see I'm not."  
"Carl, wait! What is Negan doing here? ”  
"Negan is visiting here," a voice said from the hallway.  
Olivia turned slowly, shaking. Negan stood in the doorway, looking around.  
"And as a guest, I'd enjoy some refreshments ... What's your name, honey?"  
"Olivia ..."  
,,Great! I know I left you a box of delicious lemonade. Are you going to do one for us? ”  
Olivia began to stutter.  
,,I have to go..."  
"Now!" Negan shouted. "Now," he added more calmly. "And don't rush, take care, okay? Make it worth it ... "  
With a shaky step, Olivia ran to the door and ran outside.  
"So, if we have refreshments ... Where's Rick?"  
Carl shrugged.  
"I don't know, I wasn't here."  
"True, true ... Never mind! Give me a little tour for now, we'll wait for your dad to come back. "

As Carl packed his things, Negan walked around, looking into all the rooms, holding little Judith in her arms. Carl was worried for the first time, but when he saw how gentle Negan was with little Judith, he calmed down a bit. Negan seemed good with the children. Surprisingly good.  
"Just a few things, we have enough ..."  
Carl tossed the remaining clothes into his backpack and looked around.  
"Done ... How long will it be?"  
Negan shrugged slightly and handed Judith a plush toy, which she threw to the ground.  
"As long as you want. You are not my prisoner. You're going voluntarily, "Negan said, laying Judith on the bed. He came closer, leaning towards Carl. "But I'll be glad if you stay as long as possible ..."  
Carl swallowed and turned away. He could barely cope with this now.  
,,I can go..."

Negan decided he wanted to wait for Rick. So they sat at the kitchen table for more than an hour, drinking lemonade. Olivia walked around with Judith in her arms, trying to get busy working around the kitchen.  
"So," Negan said, standing up and taking his bat. "Where the hell is Rick?"  
Carl noticed Olivia start to back away.  
"He ... He went looking for things ... For you ..."  
"Um ... I hope he comes back soon. It's not such fun without him ... "  
"Boss?"  
An unknown woman appeared in the doorway and pointed behind her.  
"There's a guy here who wants to talk to you."  
"Today is more and more interesting. Tell him I'll be right there, Arat. Carl, wait here for me. I'll pick you up when it's done. "  
Carl just nodded. As soon as Negan left, Olivia turned to him in confusion.  
"Are you leaving? Does Rick know about this? ”  
Carl had no idea what to say, so he kept quiet. The truth was, he was a little worried about his dad coming back. If he was really honest, he hoped they would leave before he returned. He still had no idea how he wanted to explain it to him.

After a few more minutes of waiting, it was not Negan, but Arat, who had come for Carl.  
"My boss is sending me," she said as she appeared in the doorway. "You have to come right away, things with you."  
Carl nodded and picked up his backpack. It seemed that they would finally set out. However, as soon as he came out, he found that everything was a little different.

Carl knelt on the porch, staring at Olivia's dead body. He almost didn't even realize what could happen in such a short time. Rosita lay on the ground, Arat practically kneeling on her, the weapon aimed at her head. Negan walked around, holding a home-made bullet in his hand. And Rick showed up.  
,, Rick! Look everyone! It's Rick! Fucking amazing that you bothered to join us! ”  
"What ... what happened here?" Dad asked, confused.  
Carl rose from the ground and headed for Dad and Negan.  
,,What? I just helped you again! "The guy comes to see me first," Negan said, pointing to Spencer's dead body. "He offered me a deal. If I kill you, he'll take your place! You really better watch who you let live here. But don't worry Rick, I took care of everything! And then this woman shows up, ”Negan pointed to Rosita, lying on the ground. "She fired at me! She hurt Lucille! ”  
Rick looked like he was going to scream. He trembled, his gaze darting around. Carl hoped it wouldn't happen.  
"And then, Rick, imagine that. I find out that the bitch fired a home-made bullet at me. So, Rick-Prick, I have a question. Who-makes-it? ”  
Negan's smile faded like a blink of an eye. Carl found himself unconsciously fascinated by the power and authority that radiated from him.  
"I ... I don't know about that," Rick snapped.  
Negan just shook his head and rested his bat on his shoulder.  
"I'll pretend I didn't hear it. So. Either I find out who it really is, or our dear Olivia will be the first, but not the last, to lie here on the ground. "  
"I ... It was me ..."  
Carl looked at Eugene, who raised his hand shakily.  
"You?" Negan asked mockingly, coming closer. ,,Really?"  
Eugene began chanting the process of making a bullet, as if his life depended on it.  
Maybe he depended.  
"Okay, okay, I trust you. Damn. Today is fucking better and better. The question now is what are we going to do about it all. Rick, any suggestions? Do you want to show your leadership skills in practice? ”  
Rick didn't seem to want to show Negan anything. Maybe except for a pointed weapon. But he remained silent.  
Negan sighed and walked over to Carl. He put his arm around his shoulders and pointed the bat at Rick, who was watching in horror.  
"That's what I was talking about," he told Carl quietly. "How many people do you think he would let die before admitting your small producer here?" Or would he wait for the guy to do it himself? ”  
Carl swallowed. Negan was right, and that was the worst part. Rick always believed that everyone would be willing to sacrifice for a good cause. But Carl doubted that Rick thought that some people just wanted to survive another day. Not to sacrifice for the higher good that Rick promotes so much.  
"Don't worry," Negan muttered, his palm gripping Carl's shoulder tightly. "I'll help you not make the same mistakes as him."  
Negan then walked away and looked around.  
"I think we have everything we could want. We will take your ammunition manufacturer with us, maybe it can still be useful. And we will load our things. I hope Rick found something really nice. Because after today ... You're in the red. No matter how much you want to bring in, it's okay? ”  
To Carl's surprise, Rick nodded and turned away.  
"And we will go. You can say goodbye so that your dad doesn't swear that I dragged you by force. We will wait at the gate. "  
As soon as Negan left, Rick ran to Carl.  
"What the hell did he mean? Where are you going? ”  
Carl picked up his backpack from the ground and put it on his back.  
"I'm going with him to the Sanctuary."  
"Carl, you can't do this! He'll kill you! Is he threatening you with something? ”  
Carl frowned and took a step back. There were times when his dad was everything to him. The hero he worshiped. A man whose opinion was everything to Carl. However, it all fell apart by the time they had to escape from prison, Rick was lying unconscious on the couch and Carl had to take care of everything.  
"Negan is not threatening me. I go voluntarily. "  
"I won't let you," Rick shouted, grabbing Carl's hand. "I won't let you go with that madman!"  
Carl pulled away from Rick and took a few steps back.  
"I'll be back in a few days ... I ... I have to go ..."  
Rick seemed to want to say something more, but Carl ran away. He feared that if he stood still for another second, he would never leave.


	3. Chapter 3

Carl expected the return to the Sanctuary to be a little messy. Most of the Saviors around looked at him with a suspicious look, someone looked rather curious. Apparently no one understood why he returned voluntarily to the lion's den.  
Carl didn't understand that either.  
However, when the cars stopped in the yard near the factory, several strangers ran straight to Negan and started saying something to him quickly. Carl didn't hear what it was. But from the look of pure anger that appeared on Negan's face, it was clear to Carl that something was very wrong.  
,, Search everything! I want that son of a bitch here and now! ”  
Carl slowly closed the truck door and hesitantly came closer to Negan.  
"What ... what happened?"  
"Your little friend Daryl escaped. I wonder how he did it. He should have been fucking under lock and key! ”  
For a moment, it looked like Negan would continue to rage. Eventually, however, he calmed down a bit and leaned against the bat.  
,,Does not matter. I'll find him. And he will pray that he will never be born, believe me. Now what about you ... I'll go get Arat, he'll find you a place to sleep and work. We need to integrate you into the team a bit. After your arrival today, you will need to show people that you are willing to do something other than shoot them. "  
That was something Carl was ready for. So he just nodded and followed Negan to the factory.

Carl was not welcome among the Saviors. Most people seemed to like to see him dead. Carl didn't blame them. He didn't make the best first impression. He and Arat walked throughout the area, trying to remember everything she showed him. Where he will sleep, where he will work.  
Kitchen.  
Carl hated cooking. But it was clear to him that nothing better awaited him. Most of the women he was introduced to looked at him with contempt and even hostility. But when Arat told them that Negan was expecting cooperation, they all nodded and led him to a place where vegetables were being processed.  
Respect in practice, it was clear to Carl.

It must have been night. There was much more silence in the factory, with only a few people and guards passing by and back through the hall. Carl sat with two women on the ground, scratching potatoes. He had no idea how long he had been doing this. It must have been barely a few hours. According to the pain in his hands, it could have been years. At first there was a tense silence in the trio. The women sat a little on it, as if afraid he would try to kill them with a potato peeler. So Carl decided to do what Negan advised him to do - to gain respect for his work. So he sat and scratched until it was covered in potato peelings.  
After a while, one of the women started talking to him. General sentences. Give me the knife, give me the pot. It wasn't much, but Carl tried to comply. And thanks to that, he noticed that after another moment, the other of the women easily joined the conversation. Sometimes they mentioned something about the operation of the kitchen, what exactly Carl would do. They talked about what was going to be cooked the next day. For how many people will it be. Carl asked, trying to give the impression that he was interested in the subject.  
Carl didn't really care about potatoes. But the fact that in the end the women sat a little closer was quite a big win for the day.

"Well, what my eyes can't see. Our new help in the kitchen in action. I should have gotten you a nice apron, don't you think? ”  
Carl placed a heavy pot full of water and potatoes on the stove and wiped the sweat from his forehead. As soon as he turned, he saw a smiling Negan behind him.  
"Don't you have anything better to do?" He said wearily, ignoring the shocked gaze of the two women standing nearby.  
"Not really," Negan winked, sitting down at a nearby table. "I'm still looking for that little runaway. He seems to have stolen a motorcycle and drove off. And then it occurred to me - I have someone here who knows exactly where the bastard might go and hide. So, Carl. Any knowledge you would like to share with me? ”  
Carl was silent for a moment. He had no idea where Daryl could go. The man managed to survive in the utter wilderness and needed nothing but a knife.  
"I ... I don't know where he is ..."  
Negan shook his head and pointed his finger at Carl to come closer.  
"That's not what I want to hear," Negan smiled coldly, squeezing Carl's shoulder. "I have to admit, now there's probably nothing I want more than to find out where the bastard is. I'm sure you know something. Maybe you don't realize it. But you know ... You want to help me, don't you? ”  
Carl nodded hesitantly, unable to take his eyes off Negan's eyes.  
"Very well ... Then help me Carl ... I would be really fucking grateful to you ... And I can be very grateful ..."  
Images of how Negan might be grateful to Carl came to mind. And as Negan grinned, there must have been more visible on his face than Carl was willing to admit.  
"Hilltop," Carl said softly, trying to ignore the palm that had left his shoulder and moved to his neck. "Dad has a few people there ..."  
,, Hilltop you say? Um ... That was the crazy widow of the Asian, wasn't there? ”  
Carl nodded, half thoughts elsewhere. The palm burned like red-hot iron, and it was the best thing Carl felt on his body in his fucking life.  
"Yeah, Maggie's there with the others ..."  
Negan suddenly pulled away, and Carl took a step back in fright.  
"Is Maggie there? What do you mean "is"? Isn't that woman fucking dead? ”  
Carl opened his mouth in surprise, then closed it again. Maggie was dead? How? His dad didn't say anything about it!  
"That bastard," Negan sighed. "Your dear fucking father told me the woman was dead. He even showed me the grave. I guess fake ... "  
It was only then that Carl realized that he might have revealed more than he had. Damn ...  
Negan must have noticed his inner panic. One step was in Carl's space, and his hand returned to Carl's neck, where she began to rub it gently over her skin. Carl inadvertently closed his eyes at the feeling.  
"Don't worry, darling. You didn't do anything wrong. It just turned out again that your father doesn't care what his lies do to others. I will not punish you for something you cannot do. Keep up the good work. I'll come for you later. "  
And then at the last press Negan left.  
Carl could hear women briefly talking about something excitedly behind him. But Carl could barely make it. He heard almost nothing through his beating heart.

Carl would have sworn he hadn't cooked as much food in his life as the next day. He went to bed late, got up early. He helped where he could, did as he was told. It was annoying and a little humiliating. Carl really didn't like it when someone told him what to do. But as lunch approached, people in the kitchen had more fun with him.

Carl was sitting at a table in the corner of the kitchen with another woman from the kitchen. There was a pause during which he finally had the opportunity to eat his own lunch. There was also a small talk about what it's like in the Sanctuary, how it goes here. These were things Carl had heard before, but he still listened carefully. Carl knew the value of the information well.

After the break, his shift ended. With the time off now, he decided to take a walk around. The guards watched him closely at every step, but no one tried to stop him. Carl walked inside the factory for a while before heading outside, into the fresh air.  
Outside, he surprisingly found Eugene sitting in a corner on the ground.  
,, Carl! Come here!"  
Carl nodded and walked closer. The man looked awful. Beaten, he had a dark monocle under one eye. But the worst was the panic in the man's eyes.  
,,What's happening?"  
,,Did you hear that?! Negan somehow learned that Maggie was alive. He was very upset. They came for me! He kept screaming to tell him what I knew! But I don't know anything! "  
Carl knelt across from Eugene and grabbed him by the shoulders.  
"You have to calm down, now! What did you tell him? ”  
,,Nothing! I don't know how he found out! He kept shouting that someone would pay for it! And then he told me to start making bullets, they would be needed! "  
"What do you mean?" Carl asked confused.  
"I think he wants to attack Hilltop. He wants to come for Daryl. He thinks he's right there. "  
Carl sat down on the ground. Negan obviously didn't tell anyone who gave him the information.  
"Do we have to do anything?"  
Carl grinned.  
"And what exactly do you want to do? You are here as a prisoner. "  
But Eugene just shook his head and stood up.  
"I'll come up with something ... Try to find out where Negan found out. You have freer movement than me. "  
And with those words he left.  
Carl remained seated on the ground. Did Negan really want to attack Hilltop? In retrospect, he didn't even realize that he had revealed so much information to Negan. But why didn't his dad tell him about the lie with Maggie? Was he afraid he would reveal it?  
Carl rubbed his forehead, suddenly feeling the oncoming headache.  
He hated these games and plans he still didn't know a word about. How could he possibly behave when he doesn't even know that something is going on somewhere ?! He hated it. He hated it for so long. Thanks to that, there were always more and more dead. And his dad did it on and on. Probably as long as he is left alone, surrounded by the corpses of his friends.


	4. Chapter 4

Carl might have expected to see trucks full of Saviors rushing to Hilltop, led by Negan, with revenge in his eyes. Nothing like that even happened. Neither that day, nor the next day, nor the next. Carl continued to work in the kitchen, occasionally having a few random conversations with people around. He hadn't seen Negan in a few days.  
It might have bothered Carl a little more than it should. As he lay in his new bed at night, listening to the snoring of the people around him, he had to admit that he was used to the presence of the older man. They met a few times, barely under ideal circumstances. But if Negan could do anything really well, it was to make an impression.  
And that impression lingered in Carl for a really long time.

Negan's lunch was always carried by one of his wives. Carl never paid attention to women. Apart from Enid, he didn't have much experience. But he still had to admit that they were all very beautiful. One of them always came, took a tray that the head cook was preparing especially for Negan, and left with a quiet "thank you." The tray then somehow mysteriously reappeared in the kitchen.  
Carl had to admit that he would like it too - for someone to carry food under his nose.

That day looked normal. Carl served lunches, the head cook preparing food for Negan. Out of the corner of his eye, Carl watched the entrance to the dining room. When will any of Negan's wives show up for food? However, when one of them appeared, Carl knew immediately that something was different.  
Carl remembered this woman. She was young, blonde. Her boyfriend was probably the one with the iron on his face. Even now, Carl was a little sick of it. The girl looked around the dining room and, with a visibly trembling step, headed straight for Carl. As she came closer, Carl noticed that her eyes were red from crying.  
"Are you ... Are you Carl?"  
,,Yes..."  
"You have to bring food today," she said quickly.  
,,Why? I'm not his maid, "Carl said, pointing to a line of people waiting for food. "I have a job."  
The girl looked as if she had been slapped.  
"He can't hear this!" She blurted out in panic. "You have to go, he's waiting!"  
"I'll take it for you boy," one of the cooks said behind him. "You better not keep him waiting."  
"Okay," Carl sighed, handing her the ladle.  
Why him?

The answer came in a few minutes. Carl managed to bring the tray from the dining room to Negan without accident. He hesitated at the door, but finally knocked on the door with a light kick and waited for it to open. When nothing happened for a moment, he kicked again.  
"It's open," said from inside.  
"My hands are full," Carl shouted. "Open up!"  
The door opened after a while and Carl went inside.  
"Do you know I don't usually let people kick in my door?"  
Carefully, Carl placed the tray on the table and turned to Negan, who was leaning against the door.  
"I didn't know what to do," Carl shrugged. "Can I go now?"  
"You definitely can't," Negan smiled and went to sit down.  
Carl stood silly on his way to the door.  
,,Why not?"  
"Are you in a hurry?"  
"I have a job in the kitchen. Your wives normally bring your food, why not today? ”  
"I think you've noticed that today is a little sharpened."  
Carl's eyes narrowed suspiciously. He remembered the girl and how she looked tearful.  
"Did you do something to her?"  
Negan raised an eyebrow.  
"Do you think I beat her?"  
"She looked pretty bad," Carl said.  
"I don't know what you're thinking, I haven't hit any of them once. I'm not such a bastard, "said Negan. "But I've found that one of them seems to be behind Daryl's escape. She disappeared shortly after him and no one can tell me where or when she left. I simply asked them, one girl after another, if they knew anything. "  
Carl didn't see the questioning, but he could imagine that it might have looked like a death threat to a delicate girl. It explained why she looked so frightened and insisted that Carl not keep Negan waiting. Maybe she thought a similar fate awaited him.  
"Okay, your wife ran away. How it relates to me. "  
"I've noticed you're starting to talk to the people in the dining room," Negan said, as if by accident.  
"How do you know that?" Carl asked sharply. "You haven't seen me in days."  
"I don't have to be there physically to know what's going on."  
Guards. Who else would bring information to Negan. Apparently they were watching him even more than he thought.  
"Okay, I'm talking to them. That's what you wanted, isn't it? To fit into the team. "  
"Don't get me wrong, I literally love watching you become an obedient housewife," Negan grinned. "I'm talking about something else. I need you to listen. And carefully. Sherry couldn't be the only one involved in the escape. And I need to find out who it is. The guards are all noticed, no one will say anything in front of them. But you look like such a nice innocent face. "  
"Do you want me to spy on your own people for you?"  
Carl frowned in disgust. Why on earth would he do that?  
After a moment of silence, Negan stood up and strode toward Carl. Carl started to back away immediately, but after a while he hit the door.  
"I know I'm asking a lot of you," Negan said with a smile that looked far too dangerous. "It's ugly, I get it. But you have to help me. You can see for yourself what's going on here. There are traitors. Not just one, but more. I need to find out who it is. And punish them. "  
Carl swallowed and took a deep breath.  
"I see," he nodded slowly, trying to come up with an answer. "But ... They don't know me ... They won't tell me secret plans ..."  
"You don't have to talk to them. All you have to do is walk around the factory from time to time. I'll let you cut shifts in the kitchen so you have time. Listen to them, look around. I need to find out who it is. "  
"What will I get out of it?" Carl asked quietly.  
Instead of a verbal answer, Carl received a kiss on the lips. At first it was a simple touch. But then strong arms wrapped around Carl's waist and the kiss deepened. So far, Carl had kissed barely a few people. But this was much more than he had ever experienced.  
"Take it as a backup for your future services," Negan whispered, kissing Carl's exposed neck.  
Carl clutched a leather jacket in his hands, unsure whether he wanted to break away or want it to continue.  
"Wait ... Negan ..."  
"Hm?"  
"You don't have to do this just because ... Because of spying," Carl said breathlessly.  
He immediately felt sharp teeth on his skin.  
"Trust me, I'm not doing this for you to do dirty work for me," Negan said, pulling away a little. "I do it because I want to. It seemed like a good time. "  
Carl couldn't help but smile. He was a jerk.  
"Okay, I ... I'll try to walk here," Carl finally nodded. "But I don't want to promise anything."  
"Don't worry about it, everything will be better than nothing. Now run, so that the others don't think something has happened to you. "  
Carl took it as a good excuse to disappear and literally ran out of the room.  
Only a few meters away, hidden on the stairs, he was able to stop, lean against the wall, and take a deep breath. His lips tingled. His skin was like one fire.  
What did he just get involved in ?!


	5. Chapter 5

It was a night. Carl was supposed to go to bed, but he couldn't sleep. So he went for a walk around the factory, wandering here and there. He met a couple of guards. But as soon as they saw him, they just nodded and left. Carl would bet it was related to Negan's request, which he had told him a few days ago.  
A lot of things had changed for Carl since meeting Negan in the room. He worked only in the morning or in the evening, he had time off during lunch. The guards now almost ignored him, he had access to literally anywhere. The only one watching him was Arat. Carl didn't know if she was trying to hide or not. But Carl knew about her. She went where he went, watching what Carl was doing, who he was talking to. Carl let it be. It was clear to him that Negan would not let him go everywhere unattended.  
One kiss will not help you gain trust. Even though it was a damn great kiss.  
Carl realized he was standing in the lobby, looking aimlessly out the window. A lot has happened to him lately. Especially when he remembered those lips sliding down his throat ...  
Carl might have been more interested in the idea, but then he heard quiet voices coming from a small room next to the hall.

"I can't ... When he finds out ..."  
"He won't figure it out," said another voice.  
Carl recognized them immediately - Eugene and Dwight.  
"How did you progress?"  
"I ... I've changed my approach a little. They look like normal bullets, but they tear when fired. I don't ... I don't have a chance to try it in person, but it should at least damage the weapon. You have to take the right ones. It can rip your fingers off ... "  
"Okay, okay ... Keep going, I'll make sure everyone has the faulty bullets when it's time to attack."  
"When is it supposed to be?"  
"Who the hell knows," Dwight growled. "Negan just sits in his room and fucks his wife. Sometimes I hate him so much ... "  
"What about Sherry, did she do it?"  
There was a moment of silence from the room. Carl crouched in a corner by the ajar door, where he could hide behind boxes of things, and leaned closer.  
"Yeah, she's a good woman. No wonder she went with us. She's had enough of that bastard. Just the idea of what the scum did to her ... "  
"It'll be over soon," Eugene muttered. "All you have to do is pass the information to Hilltop and Alexandria. If there is a battle, the Saviors will lose their weapons. And you will have your revenge. "  
"Finally!" Dwight laughed. "We'd better get out, I don't want anyone to see us. Then leave me some bullets in our place, marked. I don't want the gun to explode in my hand. "  
Carl didn't wait any longer. He crept away quickly, listening to the sound of disappearing footsteps.  
So Eugene and Dwight? He understood Eugene. The guy was not the Savior and did not want to be here. But Dwight? Carl always thought it was Negan's right hand. But the scar on his face told Carl that there must have been something wrong between them. And apparently it had to do with Sherry, who mysteriously disappeared.

Carl went to Negan's room, trying to remember everything he heard. However, when he reached the door, he hesitated.  
What happens when he tells Negan all this? Both men would certainly be punished, and Carl had no illusions about what the punishment would be. But was that something that should bother him? He didn't know Dwight at all. The man honestly meant nothing to him. And Eugene? Carl never got too close to that either ...

Carl took one last deep breath and knocked on the room door. There was a moment of silence, then an irritated "what is it ?!" Carl carefully opened the door and slipped into the room.  
Negan was apparently asleep a moment ago. He was sitting on the bed, obviously trying to wake up from a good night's sleep.  
Carl tried his best to ignore the fact that Negan was half-naked and came closer to the bed.  
"I ... Do you have a moment?"  
"Are you asking me now, after you woke me up?"  
Carl shuddered at the stupidity of his own question. Once again he felt like a small child. He hated it so much!  
"I'm sorry ... I was in the lobby where the guns were ... I was walking. And I heard Dwight and Eugene. They talked about the ammunition Eugene makes. "  
"Yeah," Negan nodded and sat down on the bed. "It's his job. And what else?"  
Carl took a deep breath.  
"I've heard Eugene say he's deliberately making bad bullets ... Because of the attack you're planning on Hilltop and Alexandria ..."  
Negan got out of bed so fast that Carl could barely blink.  
,,What? What is the son of a bitch doing ?! ”  
Carl swallowed and took a step back, just in case.  
"I'm just saying what I heard."  
"Wait, let me make it fucking clear. The bastard who looks like a parody of Elvis, is making scraps under my nose? And did Dwight find out? ”  
Carl didn't like how angry Negan was. He definitely didn't want to be around when he decided he wanted to get rid of the anger somewhere.  
"Well, Dwight ... What I understand is their common plan. Dwight was talking about Sherry, which I understood was your ... Wife. I think he probably wants revenge for stealing her from him and ... Well, did he marry her? ”  
Carl didn't know what to call it. At the same time, he didn't want to talk about Negan's sexual habits so close to Negan himself. In his bedroom. Near his bed.  
"Are you telling me Dwight is the traitor?" Negan asked suspiciously. "He is one of my most loyal soldiers ..."  
Carl shrugged.  
"I'm just saying what I heard. I don't know ... You can try to look at the ammunition ... "  
After a moment, Negan seemed to calm down a little.  
"Well, let's just say I'll believe this for a while. Come for Arat, tell her to go to the armory and give all the ammunition Eugene made sideways. I want everything, to the last bullet. I'll take care of it in the morning. Then come back here. "  
Carl nodded and hurried to the door. But before he could open them, Negan stopped him.  
"Carl?"  
,,Yes?"  
"I damn much hope you don't lie. You won't gain respect by lying. "  
Carl nodded wordlessly. He knew that well even without Negan.

Carl expected a little that when he appeared in Arat's room in the middle of the night with a message from Negan about such nonsense as sorting bullets, the woman would have at least some doubts. After all, she had known him for a while, and at first it wasn't the best.  
To Carl's shock, however, Arat did not question a word. She listened to everything Carl said, asked things she didn't understand, and left.  
It was as if she took him as an equal. Not a kid who goes with a message, because adults won't let him do anything else.  
Carl watched quietly as Arat walked to the armory, suddenly feeling something he could barely remember - pride.

"Arat went to do what you wanted ..."  
Negan was sitting on the sofa this time, wrapped in papers that were strewn across the table around him. He didn't seem to bother dressing. Carl stubbornly ignored the fact.  
,,What did she say?"  
,, Well ... Actually, nothing? She just nodded and left ... "  
"Sounds like her," Negan chuckled, pointing to the chair across from him. ,,Sit down."  
Carl sat down and looked around at the papers. They were all full of numbers, like inventories.  
"This is a list of all the ammunition that is here. I hope Arat finds as much as possible. If Eugene shuffled it between the boxes that were already there before he arrived, there's almost no way to tell. We can't go bullet by bullet and control it. "  
"I ... I don't want to sound ungrateful but ... Do you really believe me?"  
Negan set a few papers aside and leaned closer.  
"Shouldn't I?"  
,,No! I didn't mean that, I just ... "  
Carl had no idea how to describe it. But again, Negan seemed much better at words.  
"Aren't you used to people taking your opinion seriously?"  
Carl nodded embarrassed.  
"Usually not. Dad says I'm a kid, that I still have time for everything ... "  
,,What time? You live in a fucking apocalypse. When do you learn to take care of yourself? When you're dead? Nonsense ... I honestly expected more from Rick. I've heard such stories about him! I thought it was going to be a guy who knew how to take care of his people. Instead, he turned out to be an idiot who would have everyone killed ... "  
Carl felt the urge to argue, to stand up for his father. But he didn't say a word. He remembered all the people they had lost over the years. And it wasn't just Glenn and Abraham they were all talking about over and over again. It was so damn wrong ...  
"I don't know what happened," Carl admitted. "Dad wasn't like that ... He was a cop, a really great man ... But then my mom ..."  
He couldn't say it, even after that time.  
"Did she die?"  
Carl could only nod.  
"Damn, Carl ... Have you been there?"  
"I ... I shot her before she could ..."  
"Well, hell ... I'm not surprised you're growing into a little serial killer," Negan laughed.  
But then his expression grew serious.  
"You did well. Much better than suffering. It takes a lot of courage to do this for someone. But at the time we live in, there is no other solution ... "  
"You ... Have you ever had to ..."  
Negan was silent for a moment. His gaze indicated that it was something that had happened a long time ago. But to this day it has not healed.  
"No ... I should have done it, but I couldn't. I wasn't that brave Carl. I let her suffer for too long. And it's one of the things I really regret. "  
Carl nodded softly, realizing that the subject was over.  
"Okay, enough about the fucking past! We'll have a meeting in the armory in the morning. We'll see if what you heard is true. "  
Carl nodded for the last time and left without a word. He barely had a few hours before he had to get up again. And prepare for what awaited him the next day.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for your comments, kudos and support! You are amazing people and I am very glad that you like my stories!

Early in the morning, Carl was awakened by Arat. She threw clothes at him and ordered him to come to the armory. Carl dressed quickly, trying to ignore the inquisitive glances of the people in the room. Carl had been used to sleeping with others since he was little, but now he would appreciate it if he could be alone. He had no idea what awaited him in the armory.

The armory itself was a large place. But now it seemed almost full. Most of the soldiers who belonged to Negan were present. Carl was determined to stay somewhere in the back, but as soon as Arat saw him, she brought him forward. Carl straightened his hat and looked around.  
Negan stood by the crates where the ammunition was stored. A bat on his shoulder, a smile on his face.  
"I'm sure you're all damn curious why I called you all here. I have good news today and I could not help but share it with you. As you all know, war is coming. People from several settlements have decided that we are a threat to them. I was a little worried, I confess to you! After all, war is bad for both sides. Recently, however, we got fucking amazing help on our side - Eugen! "  
Negan pulled Eugene close, his hand firmly on his shoulder. Carl noticed the horror of Eugene in his eyes. He seemed to faint at any moment. Carl wasn't even surprised.  
"This talented man makes those nice little bullets that will help us win the war. Today I decided to take a look at what nice things Eugene has done for us! Arat? ”  
Arat stepped forward and handed Negan a pistol and a box of bullets. Negan put several of them in the magazine and loaded his weapon. He almost seemed to fire, but then he shook his head and laughed.  
"I'm a terrible rude! I think that the honor to try our new ammunition should be given to those who were in charge of the entire armory and production. Dwight? ”  
Dwight reluctantly stepped forward. He looked pale.  
,,Yes boss?"  
"Please do it. It's your job, you have to be proud of it! "  
Carl noticed Dwight look at Eugene. He closed his eyes tightly, as if expecting the worst.  
Dwight aimed his weapon at a nearby wall and fired after a moment's hesitation.  
A deafening wound erupted in the hall, then replaced by a cry of pain. Dwight lay on the ground, holding a hand that was bleeding heavily. Carl stepped aside in shock, as did most of the others around him.  
"Damn," Negan said coldly, looking at Eugene, who was pressing against the wall. "So it's true ... Take him to jail! Dwight too! And someone tie his hand, I don't want a fucking mess here! Shit..."  
People around began to follow orders, others quickly left the armory. Carl had no idea what to do. He heard him talk about it, yes. But seeing it in practice was something else. Carl was sure Dwight had at least a few torn fingers.  
"Carl?"  
Carl looked away from the blood on the ground and looked at Negan, who came to him.  
"I don't say it often, so remember it fucking well. But I have to thank you. "  
Carl raised an eyebrow in surprise. Wow ...  
"If my men go to a shootout with this, they're dead. I can't understand why that son of a bitch did that," Negan snorted.  
"Well ... You took his wife," Carl suggested quietly. "And ... You scarred his face ..."  
"Because of a woman?"  
Carl inadvertently remembered his father, kneeling on the ground in the middle of Alexandria, covered in blood.  
"Sometimes it's enough ..."  
"I guess there will be something to it ... Anyway, your information turned out to be correct. Come to me tonight, we'll discuss your new future at the Sanctuary. "  
Carl couldn't help but smile. A new future ... It sounded nice.

The day passed quickly. Carl helped out in the kitchen, eventually staying over lunch even though he had no shift. Now that he no longer had to look for any traitors, he was a little bored. And so he helped out serving food, talking to the people around him. It seemed that a few people had finally got used to him during his time in the Sanctuary. It was good to see a smile on people's faces instead of fear or hatred.

In the evening, Carl waited for everyone to go to bed. He knew he should have come to Negan a long time ago, but suddenly he seemed to lack courage. During the day, he warned himself not to make much promise from the meeting. Negotiating his future probably meant he would get another position. Maybe he'll finally get out of the kitchen and go ... Garden? More dirt, but he would be out in the fresh air. Yes, it sounded like negotiating a new job. Not something that went through Carl's head all day.  
But Negan promised to reward him. And Carl was already too deep in that shit not to admit he wanted the reward.

The first knock was so quiet that Carl wondered if Negan had heard it at all. However, when the door opened, Carl took one last deep breath and went inside.  
The room was pleasantly dark. Negan closed the door behind Carl and pointed to the sofa by the window.  
"Sit on the couch. We have a lot to discuss. "  
Without his iconic leather jacket, Negan looked almost naked. Carl pushed the idea to others he didn't want to deal with now.  
"Yeah ... Well, what is it?"  
Negan walked over to a nearby bar and poured himself a glass of bourbon. Then he poured the second one and then handed it to Carl.  
,,I do not drink..."  
"Just today, to celebrate," Negan smiled and sat down closer.  
Carl drank a little. Alcohol burned through his throat, but in the end he managed to swallow without suffocating.  
"Damn ... What is it?"  
"The best bourbon that's here," Negan laughed, sipping from his glass. "Only the best for our hero of the day."  
Carl shook his head and tried to drink again. This time, knowing what to expect, it wasn't terrible. On the contrary, it was also quite good. He already understood why the people around him always looked so happy when they found some alcohol.  
"I'm not a hero, I just helped ..."  
"I don't think you realize what you prevented," Negan said. "If they succeeded, most of my men would be lying on the ground somewhere now. And instead of fighting enemies, they would be cripples. That bastard Dwight lost two fingers. In my opinion, it would turn out the same way for others. By finding out, you saved them from both defeat and injury. And that's a big deal, Carl. "  
Carl didn't remember hearing so much praise from Negan toward anyone else.  
"Thanks ... I'm glad no one was hurt ..."  
Negan nodded and watched quietly as Carl drank again. Carl began to feel a strange heat that seemed to burn inside him. Probably his first light intoxication, he thought with a smile.  
,,Do you like it?"  
"Yeah, it's good but ... I probably shouldn't ..." Carl admitted, setting the glass on the table.  
"You'll get used to it in time ... So, about your work ... I've talked to a few people. With Dwight out of the game, Arat will take over the armory. We'll see how it works. I'd like to put you in her place. "  
"Well ... And what's her job?" Carla thought.  
"She makes some arrangements for me, she goes to the settlements with me. There she has the task of looking scary. I'd call the secretary a slash bodyguard. "  
Carla was amused by the idea.  
"I doubt you need a bodyguard. I think you'll be self-sufficient, "Carl said with a laugh.  
"A few extra eyes always come in handy. So, what do you think about that? You have her room, Arat's moving to Dwight's place tomorrow. "  
"Yeah ... I can try," Carl nodded.  
Carl was expecting anything. But this? That was much better than he ever dared to hope for!  
,,Great..."  
Carl looked around the room nervously.  
"Can I go now?"  
"Do you want to leave now?"  
Carl could clearly feel the trap on the question, despite his slight intoxication.  
"I thought you wanted to talk to me about work."  
"Enough work today. I thought it would be nice to sit in peace, talk ... "  
Negan leaned closer and Carl held his breath.  
"I think I promised you a reward if you could help me get some information. And you did far more than that. I don't want you to think I'm not keeping my word ... "  
Carl had no idea what he would say. But Negan helped him and kissed him without hesitation.  
It was nothing like the first time. Hesitant, reserved, offering. Negan roughly pulled Carl closer, and Carl more than willingly sat on his lap, continuing to try to return as many kisses as possible. He barely noticed the palm under his T-shirt, running over his bare skin. The feeling was like electricity, running through his body to his fingertips. Carl pulled away, trying to catch his breath. However, Negan barely let him breathe and continued to kiss on Carl's neck. The kisses were coarser, more passionate. Carl could feel the grip of Negan´s teeth on his skin. Maybe he even left a sucker.  
Carl literally prayed for it.  
"Have you ever done that?"  
The question made Carla moan softly. Or maybe it was the feeling of Negan's palms tightly gripping his ass and pulling him closer to the growing bulge in Negan's jeans.  
"Not really this," Carl said after a moment.  
"Such a good boy," Negan snarled, pulling Carl out of his T-shirt in one motion.  
"I'm not ... I'm not a boy," Carl snapped, kissing Negan deeply again.  
Carl's hips moved almost by themselves, longing for more of that delicious friction. As Negan's breathing quickened, he knew he was doing a good job.  
It wasn't long before Carl felt Negan's grip on his hips grow stronger. He had to be close. Carl was glad for that. He had been on the edge himself since he entered the room. Without hesitation, he leaned even closer to Negan, hearing a deep moan with satisfaction. His fingers ran through Negan's hair, inadvertently admiring how soft to the touch it was.  
"You said you didn't do it," Negan said, running his palms over Carl's bare chest, his fingers lightly teasing his sensitive nipples.  
"I didn't ... But I like it," Carl said softly, enjoying Negan's greedy touches.  
"I'm glad to hear that ... C´mon, make us come ..."  
Carl never liked being told what to do. But now nothing and no one could stop him from obeying this order. He rolled his hips forward several times until he felt a delightful wave of orgasm. For a moment, it was as if there was nothing around him. He rested his head on Negan's shoulder, muffling a loud moan, trying to catch his breath. After few long seconds later he realized that Negan was hold him in strong embrace.  
With the remaining courage he felt, he pressed closer and kissed Negan deeply again, enjoying the differences. This time it was lazy, slow, satisfying. He wandered his palms over Negan's body, enjoying the difference in size between them. It was strangely fascinating and even more supportive of more and more fantasies that floated in Carl's mind.  
,,Damn..."  
Carl couldn't help but laugh honestly.  
"Now you sound like a virgin ..."  
"Trust me, I'm far from that. But this is definitely in the top ten. "  
Carl felt himself blush even more, despite what they had already done. He hid his face in Negan's T-shirt, ignoring the quiet laughter.  
"Don't be shy. I love when people know what they want ... Get up, let's go to the shower. It will be disgusting for a while. "

Somehow, Carl expected Negan to send him away when he got out of the shower. He was not naive. Negan had enough wives who could help him with his little ... well, not so little problem. He certainly doesn't suddenly fall to his knees and confess his love for Carl. However, when he got out of the bathroom to find his clothes, he got a T-shirt and boxers instead. Negan then headed without a word to the bathroom, leaving a confused Carl standing in the middle of the room with clothes in hand and a towel around his waist.  
Did that mean he should stay?  
Carl had no idea how this usually works. Dad taught him to shoot, he didn't tell him what to do if he had a casual sex. Carl hesitated for a moment, but eventually quickly changed into clean clothes. When he lay down on the bed, he wanted to wait for Negan. But in the end he fell asleep at the sound of running water and Negan's quiet singing.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reload Chapter 7! I apologize for the error, but the previous version was not completed. Everything is fine now, I hope you enjoy reading!

The next day was busy. The soldiers were preparing for the trip to Hilltop, Carl had been helping in the armory with weapons and everything that could be useful in the attack from the morning. Carl thought he would go too. However, Arat told him at the door that he would stay in the Sanctuary, watching the armory. If only the enemies could get to the factory. Carl had no idea what he could do in that case with the few soldiers left in the factory. But he did not oppose.

And so, in a few hours, he watched a line of trucks pass through the gate and disappear into the dust of the driveway. He checked the armory several times. Then he walked outside around the fences for a few hours, checking to see if everything was in order. He really tried to spend as much time as possible on that work. But the truth was, Carl's thoughts were somewhere other than factory security.

In the morning, he met Negan in the armory. The bed was empty and cold, so Carl dressed without waiting and left. Carl didn't expect Negan to run to him with open arms. But the friendly pat on the shoulder he received was perhaps worse than the disregard Carl had feared that morning.  
Wasn't that good enough? Carl knew there was no courtesan, but in the evening he had the impression that they both enjoyed it. Was he wrong? Did Negan lie to him out of grace? Or was Carl thinking too much?  
Carl finally stopped at the watchtower at the gate and sat down in an empty chair with a view of the surroundings. Maybe he was just naive. Too young. Carl had lost track of how old he really was, but it might have been early for a love adventure.

The return of the trucks was accompanied by the joyful shouts of the soldiers. Most of the factory's residents gathered in the courtyard to witness the apparent triumphant return of Negan and his people. Carl stood in the back of the crowd, watching from a distance. He remained a little gloomy from the thought all day, but he was still really glad that most people had returned in relative health. Negan himself was covered in blood, but he looked really pleased.  
Carl decided to go back inside, maybe stop in the kitchen and talk to a few people. But calling his name stopped him on the spot. In a moment, Negan appeared beside him and patted him on the shoulder again.  
Carl began to hate the gesture.  
"Here he is, our little Carl!"  
Carl frowned at the address. Little Carl?  
,,What's happening?"  
,, We will fucking celebrate! We managed to take care of most of the fucking rebels that occupied Hilltop. Including that crazy widow. The bitch wanted to shoot me - she was too slow, "Negan added with a satisfied grin.  
So Maggie died? Carl had no idea how he should feel about the information.  
"I'm glad you're okay. What about the rest of the people? ”  
Negan waved.  
"Only some locals who chose the wrong side. Nothing we couldn't take care of! I'm so fucking glad it's over ... "  
Carl noticed.  
"What do you mean local?" What about Dad and his group? ”  
,,What about them?"  
Carl sighed.  
,,They were there?"  
"If I saw Rick Prick, I'd remember," Negan said. "That guy's dick no offense."  
Carl realized that if his father and the rest of the people weren't in Hilltop, they were probably hiding somewhere. Maybe Alexandria? They could also be in other settlements. And it was clear to Carl that when he found out that Maggie and her men were dead, he would want revenge.  
"You have to find him," Carl snapped.  
"I'm not the slightest interest in seeing him," Negan snapped. "Every time you see him, I'm sick of him. His bullshit about morality ... "  
"But his group ..."  
"Carl, I know what the fuck I'm doing," Negan said sharply. "How long have you been here, month?" You don't have to teach me how to command my own people. I'll find your dear dad when I want to. Now excuse me, I have a couple of wives at home waiting for me. "  
Carl watched without a word as Negan walked into the factory. Could he really be so ignorant? It must have been clear to him that his dad would want Negan's head. Did he care? Or was he sure of his win?

For Carl, the day began as usual. He got some work from Arat in the warehouse, helping with supplies. Only when Arat came to him saying that Negan was in the hall. Carl began to suspect. Negan usually didn't call any meetings where everyone should be.

When he and Arat arrived at the place, it was immediately clear what was happening. Negan stood beside the lit furnace. Two soldiers stood beside him. And Dwight knelt on the ground between them. It was clear to Carl at first glance that the man had been beaten. His face was wrinkled, one eye swollen. His clothes were torn in blood. Unfortunately, Carl was not surprised.  
Dwight betrayed not only the Savior but also Negan himself.  
Negan began pacing. He talked about betrayal. There he hates the feeling that he has found a traitor among his loyal followers.  
Carl had seen a similar event several times during his stay in the Sanctuary. Negan liked theater. Sometimes he didn't have much patience. Then the traitor got a bullet in the head. Sometimes he wanted to play. It was usually Lucille's turn. But Carl didn't see her today, which was weird. Negan was emotionally attached to the bat.  
Negan spoke for a moment. Carl tried to stay in the background, not to get too much attention. He didn't want people to find out that it was Carl who had cracked Dwight and Eugene on Negan. He liked his peace. The people at the Sanctuary were finally starting to like him. Carl didn't want to change that.  
Suddenly, Carl heard the terrified cries of the people around him. He quickly looked up from the ground and gasped in shock.  
Negan literally threw Dwight into the furnace.  
The man screamed in pain, jerked, trying to get out. But in vain. The foul odor of burnt flesh began to flow through the air. Most of the people around were silent in horror. Carl heard a muffled cry from the women beside him.  
"As I said, there are rules," Negan said with a mischievous smile. "I hope you've all learned your lesson!"  
At that moment, Carl would bet anything that almost no one in the lobby agreed with the punishment. He saw a disgusted look in people's eyes. But no one spoke.  
"Okay, you can go!"  
Carl took a step back.  
"Carl?" A word. ”  
Damn.  
,,Yes?"  
Negan waited for Carl to reach him and pointed to the furnace where the now motionless body was on fire. Carl refused to look there.  
"This should be waiting for his little friend from Alexandria. I wanted to do it today so that poor Dwight wouldn't be alone! But then it occurred to me - if I killed him, I would lose the nice little shiny bullets that the jerk made me. I thought about it for a while. And I came up with a great solution! ”  
"Will you let him live?" Carl asked hesitantly.  
"Never," Negan frowned. "That bastard wanted to kill me. Along with that, the rest of the people around. He deserves the worst. No, I have a better idea. I want you to go to his cell now. I talked to Eugene in the morning and he really wants to teach you how to make ammunition. I want you to be able to take his place as soon as possible. "  
Carl stopped. He knew absolutely nothing about making bullets! How was he supposed to learn it all?  
"It will take weeks, maybe months ..."  
"A week," Negan corrected, patting Carla benevolently on the shoulder. "Not an extra day. I hope you don't disappoint me. "  
Carl couldn't speak. Negan took it as the end of the conversation and left the hall.

It was a week of suffering for Carl. Talking to Eugene was difficult in itself. The man was beaten, handcuffed, and Carl noticed that he could barely stand up. And Carl knew it was his fault.  
Eugene didn't seem very willing to teach Carl anything at first. Carl didn't blame him. But when Eugene saw the guards walking around him, he changed his mind. And so the teaching began.  
How much gunpowder, what caliber ammunition is for what, how to put it all together. After an hour, Carl began taking notes. Eugene proved to be a very good teacher. He knew what he was talking about, he had experience.  
If he hadn't gotten along with Dwight, he could have had a good life.

"He'll execute me, won't he?"  
Carl had no idea what to say to the question. It was the fifth day of their teaching. Technically, there were two days left. Eugene didn't know anything about it, but it looked like he could feel it.  
"I guess so," Carl finally said softly.  
,,I knew it. I heard guys talking about it ... "  
"I ... Maybe I could get you a few days," Carl offered.  
"It doesn't matter anymore," Eugene shook his head. "A day or a day won't change anything. I ... I have a request for you. You're the only one I trust. "  
Carl's stomach tightened in horror at the words.  
"I heard what Negan did to Dwight. I don't want to end up like that either. If you can, shoot me. I don't want to suffer Carl. I am afraid of it..."  
Carl nodded. What else was he supposed to do?  
"I'll try to do something about it ..."

"No," Negan shook his head, finishing the glass of bourbon he held.  
He poured himself another glass and pointed around.  
"He will burn for what he did. That's my last word. "  
"But I thought ..."  
"I don't care what you thought," Negan said, and left without another word.  
Carl just sighed. Negan was a problematic personality. But in recent days, most people have preferred to get out of his way.

"What do you want from me?"  
"He will not allow it. I want you to shoot me. "  
Carl sat down heavily in a chair across from Eugene.  
"How ... for God's sake why?"  
"You can say I attacked you. I can punch you to have proof. It will be self-defense. "  
Carla was terrified at how thoughtful Eugene's plan sounded. It was crazy!  
"Please, Carl. I don't want the last thing I see in my life to be his disgusting grin. I don't want my death to be a theater to use for his propaganda. "  
That made sense. But it didn't make Carl any easier. Before he could make up an argument, Eugene suddenly stepped forward and punched Carl straight in the face without hesitation. Carl could barely suppress a painful cry. Blood began to flow from his nose, the pain paralyzing his mind for a moment.  
"Damn Eugene!"  
"What the fuck is going on!"  
Guards.  
Eugene looked at Carl pleadingly, tears in his eyes. Carl heard footsteps approaching the cell, the rattling of keys. With one last hesitation, he drew his weapon and fired.  
One of the Savior burst in, but Carl could barely hear him. Eugene lay on the ground, his eyes wide open, his gaze blank. Carl was so sick of it!  
"What ... What the fuck ?!"  
Negan.  
"He attacked me," Carl growled, pointing to his bloodied face. "I guess ... I guess he wanted to get out ..."  
With a sigh, Negan entered the cell and looked at Eugene.  
,, Son of a bitch. I had better things ready for him. Well, there's nothing you can do. Someone clean it up here! And you go to wash yourself. "  
Carl watched in shock as Negan left. He didn't expect Negan to run for his first aid kit. But such a lack of interest? What did he actually do to deserve this behavior? And what's better - what the fuck was going on with Negan?


	8. Chapter 8

"I want to know something."  
Carl looked up from the pile of potatoes he was scratching and looked at Arat, who appeared beside him.  
,,Yes?"  
"What the hell are you doing here?"  
Carl tossed the peeled potatoes into the pot and wiped his wet hands on a towel.  
"What do you think it looks like?"  
"That you started your career as a housewife?" Aren't you in charge of my former job? ”  
Carl sighed.  
,,Yes. But the problem is that no one wants anything from me for a week. So I came here and made myself useful. "  
"I thought you were going to help plan another attack?" Arat asked, confused.  
Carl grinned ironically.  
"Do you feel like we're attacking someone?"  
Arat sighed and sat down on the floor next to the pot of potatoes.  
"You're right ... I went to see Negan today. I wanted to know what to prepare in the armory and what we will do next. "  
Carla was intrigued by the information. He hadn't seen Negan himself for a hell of a long time. It could have been almost two weeks. Not that Carl counted  
"And what did he tell you?"  
Arat snorted mockingly.  
,,Nothing. When I found him in the bedroom, one of his whores was sitting on him and riding him like a racehorse. Depending on how many empty booze bottles there were, Negan must have been drunk. One of the women told me it's been like this for over a week. He just drinks and fucks. "  
Carl suppressed the bitter taste of disappointment. He should have known.  
"Well ... Negan probably celebrates the victory ..."  
,,Victory? We both know we haven't won anything yet! I was there, Carl. There were less than twenty people in Hilltop. Armed, yes. But no challenge. We only managed to surprise them, it was not the battle of the century. But we both know that your dear dad has many more people under his thumb, more settlements. And he will want blood for blood as revenge. And instead of attacking, we sit here and wait like targets at a shooting range! ”  
"Do you think I don't know?" Carl snapped angrily and rose from his chair. "I told him as soon as you arrived. And Negan told me not to teach him how to command his own people. "  
"I don't understand what's going on with him," Arat admitted after a moment. "He's changed ... Maybe you should go see him. He will listen to you. "  
Carl shook his head.  
"No ... He didn't listen to me then, he won't be now. I ... I don't want to talk to him ... "  
Arat looked at him inquisitively.  
"Did something happen between the two of you?"  
Carl pursed his lips, refusing to say anything. But even that was the answer for Arat.  
"Oh my god, you fucked with him!"  
"That's not true!" Cried Carl. "Just ... It was one night, nothing really happened. I thought it meant something. It didn't mean. "  
Arat suddenly had an understanding look on her face that made Carl feel even worse.  
"Carl ... You have to know that a guy like Negan isn't ... He's not looking for relationships ..."  
"I know," Carl nodded wearily and sat down beside Arat. "I was just naive, like a little kid."  
"There's nothing wrong with that," Arat replied quietly. "We were all there once. It is important that you learn from it ... "  
"You ... Did that happen to you too?"  
"Many times," Arat laughed. "There were plenty of them, and they all seemed perfect at the time. They weren't. But life goes on."  
Carl was glad to have Arat as a friend. He would never believe that he would get along so well with that woman. She was like his older sister, who bullied him for half the time and took care of him for half the time.  
"Thanks ... I'll try to go see him. Maybe I'll find out, "Carl promised.  
Carl would rather go anywhere but Negan. But he couldn't hide in the kitchen forever.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to everyone for more beautiful comments. You are the best! I have a little challenge for you - I'm looking for an idea for another story with this pair. What would you like to read? Write in the comments! I would love to see your ideas!

Carl didn't want to see Negan. Not really. But he had to find out what would happen next. But then it turned out to be much more complicated. No one answered the knock on the door. Negan was nowhere to be seen in the factory. And once Carl found him outside, Negan just apologized with a weak excuse and walked away. Carl didn't understand what had happened. Two weeks ago, everything was fine. Was it the night together? Or did something else happen?

Carl wanted to let it float. After all, whether Negan drank to death was not his concern. But in the end, one night he went to Negan's room again. And this time he was successful. There was a soft reply to the knock, "come on," and Carl entered the room without hesitation.  
The whole bedroom smelled of alcohol. Carl refused to think about why. Instead, he looked at Negan, who was sitting on the couch. It was immediately clear to Carl that Negan was not completely sober.  
"I need to talk to you."  
Negan laughed and pointed to the chair opposite.  
"Everyone just wants to talk to me. Tell me, boy, what's bothering you? ”  
Boy? Carl swallowed a sarcastic comment and focused on the important thing.  
"We all want to know when the next attack will be."  
"What do you still have with the attack?" Can't wait to get into the action and finally be able to kill someone? ”  
Carl couldn't believe his ears. What?!  
,,Are you serious? Damn Negan, do you even see what's going on here? ”  
"All I see is you're yelling at me."  
"Do you understand that the rest of the people who belong to Dad are out there somewhere and are probably planning an attack?" At the Sanctuary? Dad has allies in almost every settlement around us. Do you realize how many people there can be? ”  
"I've got enough people to keep it safe," Negan waved, reaching under the couch and pulling out a bottle of alcohol. "We are safe here. I've seen enough such little traitors trying to kill me. And not a single bitch has ever succeeded. "  
"No, we are not safe! Nobody here thinks we're safe! Only you!"  
"Carl, I've had enough of your shouting," Negan growled, and drank straight from the bottle. ,,We won. Is it that hard for you to understand? ”  
"I get it," Carl snapped, standing up. "The only thing you're obviously interested in now is how to drink to death! You stopped going out. You stopped caring about the Savior's cause. You have actually stopped doing anything you should do as a leader! ”  
"I don't think I need the advice of a fucking brat to advise me on how to live!"  
There was silence in the room. Carl looked at Negan, hoping he'd heard wrong. But the hint of guilt he saw in Negan's eyes confirmed that he had heard well.  
"You know Negan, I respected you. Even though you made me kneel on the ground and watch you kill two of my friends. Because you were someone who was created for this fucking apocalypse. You were able to put together a place that worked. And I know how hard it can be. But now I see that you are just someone who has earned respect by threatening others. Do you think any of those people will defend you voluntarily? They are afraid of you, they would rather kneel before you. But if they had a choice, most would probably like to watch you die on the ground in blood! I thought you cared about your people, what was going on with them. But instead of worrying about what will happen to all of us, you're just drinking and fucking the wives of other guys! This will not earn you respect. Not even from a "fucking kid" like me, "Carl said coldly, heading for the door without another word.  
Negan didn't say a word to stop him.

,,How did it go?"  
Carl shook his head, trying to stop the tears streaming down his cheeks.  
"He's such a jerk ..."  
"It's him," Arat nodded slightly.  
"I don't know what we're going to do ... He thinks nothing will happen to us here. We'll just wait for someone to attack us ... "  
Arat took him by the shoulders and shook him encouragingly.  
"Then we'll come up with something. A ride to a smaller settlement for supplies is planned for tomorrow. Don't you want to go too? You come up with different thoughts and I won't have to listen to Simon's annoying chatter all the way. "  
Carl wiped his face with his sleeve with a small smile and nodded. The way out could help him. Just drop out for a moment and not think about what's going on here.


	10. Chapter 10

"I heard interesting things ..."  
Carl tossed the last bag into the truck and looked at Arat, who was standing next to him.  
"You know I don't care about gossip."  
"But you might be interested in this gossip."  
"All right, tell me."  
"When I was in the dining room today, I was walking around the garden. And there I saw two of Negan's wives, working normally in the field. I asked what they were doing there, why they weren't with him and they weren't ... I don't know, they're jumping on his dick. And one of them told me that Negan had sent them all away, to the last one. He just told them he didn't want them anymore and they could come back for whoever they wanted. "  
Carl blinked in surprise. Did Negan give up his harem? That sounded unbelievable.  
"So I wondered if the conversation you had with him was to blame ..."  
Carl rejected the idea at the outset.  
"I don't know anything about that," he replied, returning to work. "What Negan does is just his business."  
"Maybe you should go see him."  
"I've been there before, Arat. And I learned that I was a "fucking brat telling him what to do." I don't think I want to hear any more. "  
Arat sighed and nodded.  
"Okay, I admit it. We're going on a trip. Let's go! ”  
The saviors around Carl climbed into the trucks, Carl sat down next to Arat, and the cars drove out of the courtyard. Carl had never been with the Savior yet, and to be honest, he was looking forward to it. Finally the opportunity to get out, to see something else again.

"So, how's it going to go?"  
Arat smirked.  
"I thought you knew how it went? We've already robbed your friends of a lot of things. "  
Carl tried not to think much about his betrayal of his family and old friends. Sometimes he was successful in that.  
,,Wittily..."  
"All right, all right, now seriously. We'll get to the place, we'll scare the locals a bit. We have a list of what to give us. You'll take care of it. They usually have things ready when we get there. And your task will be to check it. If anything is missing, you say. If not, we'll pack it up and leave. Simon leads this path, and it's usually quiet. The settlement is small, they have never caused problems. "  
"Will there be a lot of it?"  
,,Not here. They don't have many things, they rather supply us with food and drink. One of the locals has a distillery, so he supplies us with alcohol. "  
Carl nodded and took the list from Arat. There really weren't many items. It seemed like easy work.  
"It sounds easy. When will we get there? ”  
"In an hour. Maybe you're not bored anymore, "Arat laughed.  
Carl's answer was interrupted by a sudden explosion.  
The truck leaned dangerously to the side before returning to the wheels with a loud bang. Simon slammed on the brake, but as soon as the car stopped, there was the sound of gunfire.  
"Assault!" Someone shouted from behind. "They surrounded us!"  
"Shit," Arat shouted, reaching for her submachine gun. "Do you have a gun?"  
Carl nodded quickly and crouched in his seat.  
,,Where are they?"  
"I don't see anyone ... Simon! Where are the bastards! ”  
"I don't know! Damn..."  
Then another shot came from behind. The three of them quickly jumped out of the truck and looked around.  
The second truck was on fire. There were several assailants on the ground, and Carl saw one of the Saviors. Carl quickly hid behind the truck and unlocked the weapon.  
"I don't see how many there are."  
"Neither do I," Arat muttered, peering back. "I've only seen four, but that's not all ..."  
Carl took a deep breath. He's been through this before. He knew what to do.  
"We have to watch it here. Simon, go back, I'll go ahead. You, Carl, stay here. If you see anyone, shoot them. "  
Carl nodded wordlessly and crouched on the ground. He felt it again. That feeling of nervousness. Every time something like that happened, he was scared. He was a relatively good shooter, but he still saw only half of what the others. Carl feared that one day it would be fatal for him and he would simply not see his own killer. He prayed that day would not be today.  
There was a moment of silence. Carl heard only the sound of flames engulfing the other truck. Then he heard it - steps. Carl tried to see through the trees something to tell him who the steps belonged to. But he saw nothing. And then another shot came from the forest, not far from him. Carl ran to the other side of the truck and hid behind him, hoping no one saw him. The shooting was still going on. He also heard screams. And then silence again. It was so sinister. And then the last shout.  
,, Carle! Fuck here, Carl! ”  
Carl peered out from behind the truck and saw Simon and the other Saviors carrying Arat. As soon as Carl saw her, he shouted.  
Arat was unconscious, her stomach covered in blood. She must have been shot. The wound was bleeding, blood all around.  
"She has to see the doctor right away. That bastard shot her, I don't even know how many times ... "  
Carl quickly took off his shirt and tried to use it as a makeshift bandage.  
"We'll put her back, the truck is fine!"  
Simon nodded and the group headed for the back of the truck, where Arat was placed on the cabin floor.  
"Stay with her in the back, press on the wound. We have to go fast, I don't know how many are left in the area. Get in! ”  
After a while, everyone was in the cab, and the truck squealed in the direction of the factory. Carl knelt beside Arat, watching in horror as his shirt stained with her blood. Arat couldn't die! Carl couldn't imagine what he would do without her.  
"Hold on," Carl muttered softly, taking a pack of bandages from one of the Saviors. "We'll be there ..."

The arrival was terrible. As soon as they stopped, everyone got out. Simon personally took Arat in his arms and ran with her to see the doctor. Carl remained seated in the truck, unable to move. He watched his blood-covered hands quietly. Could she handle it? Or it was too late.  
"Who the hell was that?"  
One of the Saviors sitting next to him helped another from the truck and turned to Carl.  
"Probably someone from Grimes. Same weapons as in Hilltop. They had to wait for us, they knew we would go there. One of them had a grenade launcher! Dude ... You should go see a doctor. You're bleeding ... "  
Only then did Carl realize he had something on his face. He seemed to have hit his head in the car during the explosion.  
"It's nothing ... What about you? Do you want help? ”  
"Sure, take him from the other side. I think the blast crushed his leg, "the man nodded and jumped out of the truck.

Two Saviors were wounded. Three, if they counted Arat. One dead.  
Carl sat on the desk in the infirmary, letting the doctor clean the wound on his forehead. The rest of the wounded lay on the beds around. Carl tried not to look at the first bed in line where Arat lay.  
According to the doctor, she was lucky. The bleeding stopped and Arat should recover. Carl was really grateful for the news. For a moment he really thought Arat couldn't do it.  
"All right," the doctor said, applying the patch to the wound. "It should heal in order. Maybe there won't be a scar. "  
Carl grinned and pointed to his face.  
"The scars don't bother me much anymore."  
The doctor nodded grimly and went to wash his hands.  
"I was afraid I would hear something like that. Anyway, that's all I can do here. If you need anything, come. "  
Carl left the infirmary with thanks, determined to get to his room and sleep. He had a headache, and the doctor's pill had not yet begun to work.

But when Carl reached his room, he found Negan sitting on the bed.  
"What are you doing here?" He asked bluntly. "I want to lie down."  
Negan got up and went straight to him.  
"I wanted to see if you were okay. I heard what happened. "  
Carl sat down on the bed, ignoring Negan's stare.  
,, Great. So you know everything. Can you please leave? ”  
"Carl, what's going on?"  
Carl laughed coldly at the question.  
,,What's happening? Are you serious? They almost killed us all! One guy is dead! Arat was almost bleeding in my hands! And that's because of you! ”  
Negan shook his head incomprehensibly.  
,, How can it be my fucking guilt! I didn't shoot there! "  
"It was Dad's people! I told you they would take revenge. They knew we were going there. Just wait for them and we went into a trap! And why? Because you have decided that alcohol and your whores are more important than everyone around you! ”  
"Damn Carl, I know I screwed up," Negan admitted reluctantly. "But you have to trust me ..."  
"I don't want to hear it," Carl said, feeling a growing headache. "If you have excuses, go tell them to the people in the infirmary. I don't fucking care what you want to say. "  
,,What is wrong with you? Since when have you been like that? ”  
"Ever since I found out that you don't really care. Negan, I get it. You feel guilty and you want to fix it with some excuses. But it doesn't matter. It's already happened. It won't change anything. "  
Carl rubbed his forehead with a sigh, trying to ignore the dull rumble in his skull.  
"I can fix it," Negan said suddenly.  
"I don't care Negane," Carl said honestly. "You're not who I thought you were ..."  
Negan sat down slowly beside Carl. There was a moment of silence between them.  
"I wanted to show you that you can live better," Negan said slowly. "I wanted to show you that you don't just have to run after your dad and pray that his next decision won't kill you. But ... I think I showed you something even worse ... "  
Carl looked up and met Negan's gaze.  
"I agree with you on that."  
Negan suddenly stood up sharply.  
"I'll fix it, Carl. You have to trust me. "  
"I don't want you to fix anything for me," Carl said. "We will all die one day anyway. It probably doesn't matter if it's on my dad's side or yours ... "  
Negan said nothing, just turned and left the room vigorously without a word.  
Carl lay down slowly on the bed, enjoying the quiet silence.  
What did Negan want to fix? It was too late. Arat was wounded, others as well, one person died. And unnecessarily. Carl hated it when he saw the people around him die needlessly. He knew what time he lived. But they could still have prevented it.  
Carl doubted anything would change. Negan has been like this for too long. He could hardly really care about the people around him now.


	11. Chapter 11

Carl slept almost until lunch the next day. Nobody woke him, nobody wanted anything from him. After a brief visit to the kitchen where he took his food, Carl went to the infirmary.  
Arat was still unconscious. However, the doctor tried to calm Carl down and told him that it was better for her. She has a chance to heal well and he said she was out of danger of her life. It improved Carl's mood a bit after talking to Negan from the day before.  
When he remembered the man, he only felt angry.  
He'll fix everything. And how did he want to do it? Go back in time?

However, Negan was reminded a few hours later when Simon came for him and told him that Negan wanted to see him in the boardroom.  
Carl considered for a moment that he would simply refuse. But he did not want to cause trouble in front of others. So he nodded and walked.

In the room, at a long metal table, Negan sat with the other soldiers. They had maps laid out in front of them and were discussing something. Carl cleared his throat and went inside.  
"Did you want to see me?"  
Negan nodded vigorously and pointed to a chair with a wide smile.  
,,Great! Sit down, it'll be a longer talk. "  
Carl sat hesitantly and looked at the maps on the table. He immediately noticed that Alexandria was on them.  
,,What is it about?"  
"I want to attack Alexandria. It is clear that the attack on your column is the fault of the people of Grimes. "  
"Why?" Carl asked incomprehensibly. "You said we were safe here."  
Negan looked into Carl's eyes for a moment. Then he nodded at the people around him.  
"Go. I can handle it now. Then I'll let the details know. "  
Everyone left without objection. The last one leaving, Simon, closed the door behind them.  
Carl didn't want to be alone with Negan. Not after everything that happened between them. It was unfair. The man bothered him so much! And it was unfair how good the man still looked.  
"Concentrate," Carl thought.  
"I want to know everything you can tell me about Alexandria."  
Carl was confused again.  
,,You were there. You know where they have the gate, where the house is. What can I tell you? Where are carrots grown there? ”  
Negan was obviously determined to ignore Carl's mocking tone.  
"No, I'm not interested in vegetables," Negan replied calmly, taking off his jacket and setting it down in a chair next to him.  
Carl was fully focused on ignoring those tattooed arms. He was also a bit successful.  
"So what's your interest?"  
"Alexandria is no longer just a bunch of farmers led by a frightened woman. It's Grimes. And that guy is a warrior. I want to know everything that could thwart our win. Where their weapons are hidden, where Grimes' people are hiding, where there are escape routes. All that. "  
Carl blinked in surprise. Did it seem to him, or did Negan take the battle seriously?  
"Don't you want to rely on luck this time?"  
Carl couldn't forgive the scathing remark.  
Negan sighed wearily.  
"No, I don't want to, Not after what happened to the caravan. I don't want to see anyone else dead unless necessary. And it was not necessary there. Neither the dead nor the wounded. "  
Carl nodded slightly. That sounded reasonable. But it didn't sound like Negan walking among them the last few days.  
"All I know is how things were before I left," Carl admitted, looking at the maps again. "Dad could have changed something."  
"Anything is of value to me."  
There was a moment of silence in the room.  
"Why are you doing this, Negan?"  
,,What do you mean?"  
"You acted like a bastard two weeks ago," Carl said straight. "You were only interested in two things. It wasn't a fight. And now all of a sudden you're planning and you want to avoid risk? ”  
"I'll try to ignore the bastard," Negan grinned. "You know, I've always liked that about you. You're not afraid of me. And you're honest. It's a fucking rare trait at this time. "  
"If you want help with the raid, you don't have to flatter me and praise me," Carl said. "I'll do it without it."  
Negan's smile disappeared in the blink of an eye  
"What the hell do you mean?"  
"Nothing," Carl replied, pointing to the maps. "Do you have a pencil? I'll tell you where what is. "  
"Answer me," Negan said, leaning closer. "What the fuck did you mean?"  
Carl sighed. He didn't want to talk to anyone about it. He should have kept quiet. But when else will he be able to complain nicely?  
"Every time you want something from me, you're nice. When you wanted to find out who was planning something here, you claimed how beautiful and smart I was and I don't know what kind of shit. When you wanted to make bullets, you slapped me on the shoulder. Now you want information about my dad and again you say how amazing I am. Meanwhile, if you don't want anything from me, you're treating me like a dog. I don't care if you don't like me. Just tell me what you want and I'll do it. You don't have to lie in front of me. "  
Carl didn't want to say that much. But it was like a stream of water that could not be stopped. The thing bothered him so much!  
"You think what happened between us was because of the information?"  
Carl laughed at Negan's surprised expression.  
"Why else would you do that? Negan, I'm not as old as you, but I'm not a child. I've seen it so many times. Here, in other settlements, among my own people. I get it, really .. "  
Negan was silent for a long moment. His gaze was unreadable. Carl just prayed he could leave as soon as possible. He didn't want to talk about it. About how naive he was and thought that one orgasm and a few kisses would make Negan his lover.  
Arat was right. These things happened.  
"It wasn't for information, Carl."  
Until recently, Carle would be interested in this information. But not now.  
"When do you want to leave?" Carl asked, changing the subject without hesitation.  
He would rather plan an attack on innocent people than talk about his feelings. He was sick of it.

Planning took a week. Carl marked places on the map, describing everything that could be useful in the fight against the people of Alexandria. When he wasn't helping with the planning, he was sitting in the armory making bullets, one after the other. It was slow, boring, and it tormented Carl.  
He made bullets that could kill people he knew. They knew him from a little boy when he was still with his mom and Shane. He knew Daryl even longer than Dad.  
And now Dad's people were trying to kill him. As if he were just another Savior.  
What exactly was he? Savior? Stopgap? He just wanted to stay for a while, find himself, and then come back. Instead, he found himself in a battle between the two sides.

Departure time was early in the morning. The sun was low, it was dark. Soldiers boarded trucks, Carl helping to load weapons and ammunition in crates. Negan was nowhere to be seen. Not that Carl was looking for him!  
Negan eventually appeared last. Carl was expecting a speech about a certain victory. However, Negan only ordered him ready to leave. Carl was quite surprised.  
,, Carl! I want one thing from you. "  
Carl nodded hesitantly.  
"Because Simon is coming with us and Arat is out, no one from command will remain. I want you to take care of people. "  
Carl wanted to say something. But he didn't have a single idea of what it should be.  
,, How ... How to take care of people? What do you mean?"  
Negan pointed to a couple of locals standing nearby. Most of them had someone close to the soldiers.  
"We may lose. Fucking hope I don't. But we do not know what we will stand against. If we don't come back or you see Grimes' people, I want you to get them all out of here. Arat showed you where, didn't she? ”  
Carl didn't nod. Yes, Arat showed him where to get from the factory as quickly as possible. But he had no idea that he could ever put that knowledge into practice.  
,, Great. You're in charge of them. Everyone was informed. I want to make sure that if something sucks, there's someone to take care of them. "  
"I ... well, I'll do it."  
"Fantastic," Negan winked, smiling broadly. ,,We will go on a trip!"  
It already looked like he was leaving. Suddenly, however, he stopped and returned to Carl.  
"See, I would forget. Will you take care of her for me? I don't want her to catch another bullet, "Negan said cheerfully, handing the bat to Carl, who took it in his hand in astonishment.  
The bat was not heavy, but the importance of the thing weighed more than all the bats in the world.  
Since when was Negan willing to go somewhere without Lucille?  
"I'll take care of ... How are you going to break someone's head now?"  
Negan laughed and shrugged.  
"I'm going to fight, not to have fun. Doing a little show is always fun. But not this time. I want to do it fast and hard. "  
Carl had to admit that he loved Negan's words "fast and hard." Even if it was just an attack.  
"Okay," Carl nodded, placing the bat on his shoulder. "I'll put her in the room."  
"No no, she would be there alone," Negan said. "Take her for a walk, she likes it. In addition ... "  
Carl raised an eyebrow suspiciously. Negan's smile looked utterly sinful.  
,,Yes?"  
"It suits you," Negan said softly, brushing Carl's hair from his face. "You look like someone you don't fuck with."  
Carl couldn't help but am amused.  
"Neither do you?"  
"No one," Negan nodded. "Will you wait for me as a wife during the war?"  
"I'm not your wife," Carl said weakly.  
"It's not a rejection ..."  
It was clear to Carl.  
"No, it's not ... I ... I hope you're safe," Carl said softly.  
Negan rewarded him by stroking his cheek. Then he left, got into the first truck, and the car began to move.  
Carl stood in the middle of the courtyard, Lucille on his shoulder, his heart pounding like a bell.  
Damn Negan!


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much to everyone still present for your patience while waiting for this first chapter after a long wait. Things have gotten a bit in order, so I hope to return to writing as before. You are the best!

"Carl?" 

Carl turned slowly, still a little shocked by what had just happened. Behind him stood one of the women he worked with in the kitchen. She looked a little nervously at the group of people standing nearby, as if searching for appropriate words. 

,,Yes?" 

“You ... Are you the boss now?" 

With a sigh, Carl shook his head. 

,,I'm not. I'll just try to keep us all alive before the rest of the people come back. Can you help me call everyone to the armory? We have to prepare. ” 

The woman nodded without question and hurried away. 

,,Do you think it's a good idea?" 

Carl turned to one of the soldiers left in the factory. It was a man he was in a convoy with. As he later found out, his name was John. 

"There are ten of us. We have to protect another thirty people. If anything happens, we don't stand a chance, ”Carl sighed, placing more weapons on the table. 

In a few minutes, the rest of the people appeared in the armory. 

Carl stepped forward and looked around. 

"As you all know, Negan went to Alexandria with most of the soldiers. We are safe here for now. But that can change. I want to know which of you have experience with gunfire. Anything that would help us? ” 

About ten people raised their hands hesitantly. That was more than Carl had expected. 

,,Great! Well, how many of you are willing to help us in the fight? ” 

To Carl's shock, all the people put their hands down. 

"I didn't expect that," John laughed grimly beside him. 

A young man, perhaps Carl's age, stepped out of the crowd and headed for Carl. 

"We don't want to die here," he said in a shaky voice. 

Carl nodded slowly. 

"I will try to prevent this ..." 

However, the man shook his head in disapproval. 

"We don't want to die defending someone who doesn't care!" 

Carl had no idea what the man was talking about. 

,,What do you mean?" 

"Negan!" The man shouted. "I will not defend him! Just because he pissed someone he shouldn't piss off! ” 

Carl noticed how the people around them began to nod. Apparently they weren't big fans. 

"I don't want you to defend Negan. Negan is gone. I'm looking for help defending the factory. ” 

,, Defend the factory? Do you mean against your father? We know well who you are! Where we have a guarantee that once your dad shows up, you won't betray us! ” 

People around nodded. John sighed irritably beside him. Carl was silent. However, he was saved by a voice from behind the crowd. 

"Are you fucking kidding?" 

The crowd parted, and Carl saw Arat stride angrily at them. She was leaning on a makeshift crutch, but that fact didn't detract from her horror. 

"Do you think Carl is a traitor?" 

The younger man bowed his head and was silent. 

"It was he who saved me in the attack on the convoy. He helps you all here! And you call that shit like that? ” 

"It's okay," Carl said softly, heading for Arat. "Shouldn't you be in the infirmary?" 

"Fuck the infirmary," Arat snapped. "If there's a fight, I want to be there. This is my home and I will defend it. I would expect the same from you, ”she added to the crowd. 

Suddenly, two women came out of the crowd and stopped at Arat. 

"We ... We want to fight!" said one of them determinedly. "We can shoot! A little..." 

An older man joined them after a while. And another woman to him. And then another. 

Carl had seen many surprising things in his life. But this was damn amazing. 

"So what are we waiting for," Arat smiled and took Carla by the shoulders. "We're going to arm these people!" 

They were waiting. People were hiding in the hall. Soldiers and people who had guns were outside at the gate. 

"Do you think they'll come here?" 

Arat shrugged. 

"Unless Negan just talks again ..." 

"He's changed," Carl snapped. 

Arat raised an eyebrow questioningly. 

"He wanted to know information about Dad. He prepared for the fight ... ” 

"Does this change have anything to do with the fact that you have Lucille with you all day?" 

Carl looked at the bat, which was resting on his leg. It was a fact. He had originally wanted to take her to his room, but in the end he kept his promise to Negan. 

"I ... I'm just watching her ..." 

"Has anything changed during my unconsciousness?" Because before that trip with the convoy, Negan was the biggest bastard in the area. And after I wake up, you go here with his bat, you command the factory and you look forward to him impatiently ... ” 

"It's just a bat," Carl said weakly. 

"We both know it was never just a bat." 

"What do you mean, Arat?" 

"I heard a lot of interesting gossip. About how Negan left, how you said goodbye. Do you know that most people here think you're his new wife? ” 

I'm not anyone's wife, "Carl snapped. 

"Really," Arat asked amusedly. "Being you, I'll think about it well ... Someone might want answers soon ..."


	13. Chapter 13

It was evening. Carl sat on the gallery at the gate, watching the surrounding woods for several hours. There was peace and quiet everywhere. Carl would usually be grateful for that, but now the silence just scared him. Negan didn't tell him when he would return. Carl understood that it was impossible to say. But after so many hours of waiting, Carl was really scared. 

,,Do not worry. He will return. He is our great brave leader. " 

"It's been too long," Carl whispered softly. 

The sun was slowly setting, the surroundings were soon lit only by factory lighting. 

Arat placed a thin shabby blanket over Carl's shoulders. 

"You really like him, don't you?" 

Carl nodded. There was no place for rejection. 

"Do you think he feels the same way?" 

"I don't know ... I thought not. But ... Lately ... He tried. And when he looked at me ... Maybe I'm wrong, "Carl sighed. 

"I think I've been one of the few living people who has known Negan for a really long time," Arat said after a moment's silence. 

"I ... I've never dealt with this. Before it all started, I was a boy ... And now ... " 

"So you're saying there's no Mrs. Grimes anywhere?" 

Carl laughed at the thought. 

"There was a girl. In our settlement. I thought it might be the real thing. She is beautiful, good ... " 

"But you're not looking for a nice girl, are you?" 

"Probably not," Carl nodded. "She ... She liked me, I know. But she never understood me. She didn't want me to take off that stupid bandage. Whenever she saw me without it, she disgusted her. everything was normal. Everyone around me wanted it. But how the fucking thing can be normal ?! " 

"I see," Arat said. "I want everything to be the same, too. But pretending everything's okay won't change. We have to fight. Aren't your parents proud of you?" 

"Dad hates Negan more than anything in the world. He hates him because he represents everything he fought as a cop. So he's definitely not proud of me now. Mom ... She died, it's been a long time ... " 

,,What happened to her?" 

"She ..." Carl swallowed hard and turned away. "When Judith was born, my mother couldn't do it. I stayed with her, I knew that when she died, she would be back in a few minutes ... I shot her..." 

"Shit, Carl ... Come here ..." 

Carl let himself be hugged, finding at least a little comfort. 

There was a moment of silence between them. But then Carl heard it - the sound of moving cars. 

"Arat?" 

"I hear it," Arat nodded, picking up her rifle. "I'm going to the gate, I'll put people together. Run to the hall. If you hear gunfire, take them away." 

Carl wanted to object, but Arat disappeared into the darkness. 

"What's going on?" shouted the woman standing at the door. 

"Someone is going. We have to prepare. Do you all know where to go? " 

People around nodded. Carl took a breath and checked the magazine in his rifle. 

"You ... You won't fight them?" 

Carl raised his head. It was the young man who confronted him over his father in the armory. 

"I have to protect you. Get you out of here if necessary, "Carl said. 

The young man smiled gloomily. 

"Just you?" 

Carl nodded slowly. 

,,Just me. The rest is outside the gate. " 

The man turned to the people behind him. They stared at each other for a moment, as if there was a quiet conversation between them. 

"We ... We were in the armory," said one of the women standing nearby, pulling a rifle from behind. Carl just watched in surprise as other people around him did the same. 

"How ... Why?" 

"We know you have to be out. We ... If necessary, we will help ... " 

Carl blinked a few times. 

,,I do not know what to say..." 

"Go out, help them. We will take care of ourselves. " 

Carl took one last look at the people around him before nodding and running outside. 

Carl ran to the gate, ready for anything. He hadn't heard gunfire or anything like that yet, but his heart was pounding. What if the people at the gate didn't make it? What if something surprised them? What if... 

"Carl!" 

Carl reached the courtyard, where the parked cars stood. Cars of the Saviors. Carl looked at Arat, who ran to him with a smile and hugged him tightly. 

"They did it!" 

Carl looked at the soldiers around him. Most were injured in some way, he could see the bodies on the back of one of the trucks. It was not a free victory. But they did it. 

But what specifically? What did the Savior's victory mean? 

"I ... What about Dad ..." 

Arat pulled Carl aside. 

"What I heard, your dad's people ran away. He too. But I wouldn't rejoice in public, "Arat warned him." We lost a lot of people. And it was your dad's people who killed them ... " 

Carl nodded softly. He understood. 

"But I think you're waiting for someone in particular, aren't you?" 

,,What? No, I ... I wanted help with the wounded people ... " 

"Negan looks hurt," Arat grinned. 

Carl turned quickly. Negan stood nearby, talking to the soldiers. The leather jacket was gone, the shirt was torn and covered in blood. 

"Yeah, I ... I'll ... I'll go help him," Carl nodded. 

Arat gave him one last grin and walked away. 

"Here you are ..." Carl turned slowly. 

Up close, Negan looked even beaten up. But he smiled as he did when he left. 

"Were you waiting for me?" 

Carl nodded. 

"I ... We have to get you to the infirmary." 

"But you said you weren't my wife to wait ..." 

Carl nodded again. He did it often in Negan's presence. Too often. He didn't speak. He was afraid that if he said just one word, he wouldn't be able to stop it. But even Negan seemed to have nothing more to say. He leaned closer and kissed Carl lightly on the lips. 

Carl wrapped his arms thoughtlessly around Negan's neck. He longed so much to be stronger, to resist. So why was his heart beating so fast? 

,,Will you come with me? I'm going to need to treat all the injuries ... " 

"Yeah ... Yeah, I can do that ... I ... I'll go to the infirmary, for some bandages ..." 

Carl left quickly before saying more nonsense. He reliably ignored Negan's grin and headed for the factory.


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's another chapter to celebrate 900 hits. This time it is the penultimate, we are nearing the end! I love you all!

It took Carl a few minutes to search for medical supplies. Still, he hesitated to return to Negan's bedroom. What exactly was supposed to happen there? And what was Carl going to allow to happen? Their last meeting was amazing, yes. Still, Carl couldn't forget the weeks before Negan had acted like a bastard. 

What if it happens again? He was kind, attentive now. But what if everything goes back to normal in a few weeks? Carl knew he couldn't handle another such disappointment. Sometimes he came as a hypersensitive adolescent girl. But the truth was, he was a teenager. Maybe it was the hormones his dad talked about so many times with laughter. 

Sometimes he wanted to have his dad by his side. The man always knew what to do. It wasn't always right or safe. But without him, Carl felt a little lost. Arat told him that he was now an adult (though not his age). That he must be able to decide what is best for him. 

Was Negan really the best thing for him? 

Carl didn't bother knocking on the door. He went inside, closed behind him, and after a moment's hesitation turned the lock. He didn't want anyone to disturb them, though that was unlikely. Most of the people who were not seriously injured celebrated in the hall far away from them. 

It was just him and Negan. 

The named appeared to be in the bathroom. Carl set the bandages and first aid kit on the table and sat nervously on the edge of the bed, listening to the sound of the shower running. 

"Your dad ran away," a voice said from the door after a moment. 

Carl nodded. 

"Arat told me. She told me what his people did ... I ... Maybe I should have gone with you ... " 

"Nonsense," Negan murmured, walking over to the dresser, where he began looking for clothes. 

Carl stopped his gaze on the small faded towel Negan had tied around his waist. 

"What do you think would change? Do you think your father would suddenly stop firing and go talk? The guy won't give up. " 

"We have it in the family," Carl smiled. 

"I can't say anything about it," Negan winked. "Forget about this. We won, that's the main thing. It's time to celebrate." 

Carl pointed side by side and picked up the first aid kit. 

"I want to look at the injuries first. What happened?" 

Negan obediently sat on the bed and pointed to his stomach. 

"I met your dad in person. When he ran out of ammunition, he pulled out a knife. It was a fucking coincidence that I ran out of ammunition, too. " 

In shock, Carl took off the bloodied bandage that covered the wound and looked closer. At first glance, it was clear that it was a deep blow. Maybe sewing wasn't necessary. In any case, new bandages were needed. 

"My dad doesn't really seem to like you," Carl laughed grimly and began cleaning the wound with disinfectant. 

Negan laughed painfully. 

"It's a fucking underestimation of the situation. He shouted at me that I was a killer, that he would kill me, that I had stolen you from him. He shouted a lot ... " 

Carl pressed a clean bandage to the wound and looked up at Negan. 

"I should have called him earlier," Carl sighed. "I told him I'd be back soon ... And it's been weeks ... He probably thinks you killed me out of revenge, or you locked me in a cage somewhere like Daryl. " 

"Well ... I have to admit, I probably didn't help the whole situation," Negan admitted reluctantly, holding the bandage over his body as Carl began to tear the adhesive tape to pieces to stick the bandage on. 

,,What do you mean?" 

"When he started screaming the shit about what I did to you ... Maybe I told him something ..." 

"Should I even ask what you told him?" 

"I don't think so," Negan grinned. 

With a sigh, Carl finished the bandage. 

"Any more injuries?" 

,,I love you." 

Carl dropped the bandages on the floor in shock. 

Negan looked serious. No grin or laughter. 

"I ... Negan ..." 

"I wanted you to know," Negan said simply. "Today ... There were times when I didn't think I'd be back. And there were a fucking lot of them ... I just want you to know ..." 

Carl often had moments in Negan's presence when he had no idea what to say. But this one, it beat everyone else. 

"Negan ... This ... You almost didn't want to see me a few more weeks ago! You can't just ... Say things like that, just ... " 

Negan shook his head and rubbed his face. 

"I know I pretty much screwed up a few weeks back. But ... I didn't know what to do. I thought, I hoped, that if I went back to what I had done before, which was booze and wives, everything would return to normal. But nothing returned to the norm. You were upset. Shit, everyone was mad at me. I've had enough. And then there was the fucking accident with the convoy. When they came to tell me that there was an attack and there were dead people, I swear, I could hardly breathe ... I thought I screwed it all up, I wouldn't have time to tell you ... And then you came back and you were on perhaps even more angry with me than before ... " 

Carl remembered that time well. He felt at the time that Negan was to blame for everything bad that had happened at the factory. Not that it wasn't usually true. 

"Negan ... Are you serious?" Carl asked hesitantly. "Because if you don't, I ... I can't do it again," he added quietly, staring at the ground. "I can't see you with anyone else and know I mean nothing to you ..." 

"Damn Carl ... You've always meant something to me, from the beginning. I was just a bastard who forgot how to behave ... " 

Carl closed his eyes tightly for a moment, hoping he could get together quickly. 

"What do you want from me now?" 

"Nothing," Negan shrugged. "Like I said, I want you to know. I ... I just realized a few things. And it occurred to me, on the way back here, that there was nothing to wait for ..." 

Carl raised his head, a slight smile on his lips that he couldn't hide. He would have lied if it hadn't been the fucking most beautiful sentence he's ever heard. 

"I originally wanted to scold you before you left ... For all this ... Damn Negan, you're making it hard for me ..." 

"Oh honey, I hope I'm doing it as hard as I can," Negan winked with a smirk. 

Carl was used to such a conversation. After all, it was an apocalypse. But no one ever talked to him like that, only Negan. And even though it wasn't the first time, he could still feel himself blushing. 

"I don't know ... I don't know what to do," Carl admitted after a moment's silence. 

"Well, either we can end it today and you can go to your room ..." 

,,Or?" 

Negan leaned closer. 

"I heard how well you took care of everything here ... I'm very grateful for that ... Can I show you how much?" 

"Please," Carl whispered.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And this is the last chapter. Thank you very much to everyone who watched this story, Kudos or comment :) There is another story planned, a slightly different genre, the same couple, so when something is written, I will add :) Thanks again to everyone!

"We didn't expect it ... We lost a source of information when they killed Eugene. It looked like he wasn't going to do anything ... We didn't expect him to attack ... " 

Rick looked around Alexandria street, where several dead people were lying on the ground. Everyone cared for the wounded, there was no time to take care of the dead yet. 

"Rick ... But you should know something ..." 

Rick looked at Daryl, who was sitting next to him on the steps of one of the houses. 

,,What?" 

"They knew where the weapons were. They even blocked the escape route behind the houses with a truck! Someone had to tell them ... " 

Rick's eyes narrowed. 

"What the hell do you mean?" 

"Carl." 

Rick stood up sharply. 

"Are you accusing my son of treason?" You've known this boy for years! " 

"Yeah, I know," Daryl shouted back, also standing up to face Rick. "But as far as I know, he left with Negan voluntarily. You said he'd be back in a few days and it's months! You really think it was coincidence? Negan knew about Hilltop. Then we managed to raid their convoy and Carl was there! I saw him with my own eyes! And then suddenly the Saviors attack Alexandria. They knew all our secrets, the weapons depots, the escape routes! " 

Rick shook his head as if trying not to hear Daryl's words. But then he stopped suddenly and stared into the distance in horror, as if remembering something. 

"His boy ..." 

"What the hell are you talking about?" Daryl murmured. 

"When I fought Negan ... I asked where Carl was. I was hoping that if we could win, I could go save him ... " 

"And?" 

"He laughed at me. He just started laughing ... And then he told me something like my boy wasn't mine anymore ... " 

Daryl was silent. But even that was the answer. 

Rick sat down on the floor again and put his head in his hands. 

"It's my fault ... I treated him badly ..." 

"Damn Rick, it's not your fault that the boy ... That he chose Negan ..." 

"We have to save him!" 

Daryl sighed. 

"And who do you want to save him from?" 

Rick looked at Daryl blankly. 

,, Negan! He can't be there voluntarily, I can't believe it. Once we fix this and treat the wounded, I finally want to find out where the Sanctuary is. We'll go there and get Carl out! " 

Rick didn't expect anything and headed away. Daryl remained seated, silently thinking about the consequences of this decision. 

Carl watched Negan with wide eyes, who took off the last piece of clothing without hesitation. He had to close his eyes, as if to stop the shame that melted through his body. Nobody saw him like that. No one. 

,,Beautiful boy..." 

"Don't talk like that," Carl whispered breathlessly as Negan's palms slowly stroked Carl's bare thighs. 

"Why? Are you shy?" 

Carl nodded quickly. 

"I don't think that's true," Negan muttered, kissing Carl's calf. 

And then another kiss higher and higher. 

Carl opened his eyes, staring at the bedroom ceiling. He felt he should do something, anything. But as Negan's mouth wrapped around his cock, he could only moan loudly. 

"Damn ..." 

It was like an electric shock. It paralyzed his body, and Carl just helplessly felt it coming to an end. 

"Wait ... Negan!" 

Negan raised his head and licked his lips wickedly. Carl swallowed breathlessly. 

"I'm going to come," Carl whined. "I want ... Not like this ..." 

Negan laughed darkly and bit Carl lightly at the side of his waist. 

"And how would you like it ..." 

Carl felt Negan's cock rub against his legs. God ... 

"You know what I mean," he whimpered, unable to say it out loud. 

"You don't know how yet, do you?" Negan smiled mischievously and kissed Carl on the neck. "Don't worry. You're mine, I'll teach you how to be mine." 

Carl continued to be kissed, wrapping his arms around Negan's body himself and really touching Negan for the first time. He felt tiny old scars under his fingers, felt how hot the skin was. He heard Negan's rapid breathing and couldn't think of anything but him causing it all. That he was the reason Negan felt that way. 

“Look at how hard you are. It’s for me, isn't it? ” Negan asked scornfully. 

Carl felt his greasy fingers run over his cock and head lower. 

A desperate, whimpering please is all Carl gets out, panting and trembling in Negan´s arms. 

"Shh, we have to slow down ... Breath, you can do it. That’s right ... " 

Carl had no idea if he liked the feeling of Negan's fingers inside or not. Then another joined. Carl winced a little at the pain he felt. 

"Negan ..." 

"I know, honey," Negan whispered, kissing Carl passionately again. "You're so damn tight and hot. I can't wait to be in you. You want it, right?" 

Carl could only nod slightly as his fingers began to move faster. He never touched there in his life. He couldn't even imagine that it could be so good ... 

"Fuck, baby, you're pretty," he groans, making Carl flush even harder and his cock twitching slightly. "I wondered how good you'd feel around my cock ..." 

Carl groaned even louder. 

,,Please please..." 

,,What you want? Do you want me to fuck you? I haven't even prepared you yet ... But you don't care, do you? You just want my cock in your tight wet hole, don't you? " 

,,Yes!" 

Negan lets out a growl, forcing Carl into a deep, possessive kiss. 

Carl lets out the whimper when Negan positions himself, his cock pressing against his ass. 

,,Ready?" 

Carl nodded slightly. Negan no longer waited to push her hips against Carl's. Carl knew it wouldn't be pleasant. But suddenly he felt as if he were split in half. Negan waited for nothing and continued until their bodies touched each other. 

"Damn baby ... Give me a minute ..." 

Carl took a few deep breaths until he got used to the strange feeling. The pain was no stranger to him, but this was something completely different. Negan pulls back, almost out, and just as Carl breathes he slams back in hard, knocking all air out of his lungs. 

,,It hurts? Say it..." 

Carl nodded breathlessly, his face hidden near Negan's neck. 

"That's good," Negan whispered, pushing hard again. "You'll remember it ... You like it when it hurts a little, don't you? I can feel you clinging around me ..." 

The ruthless, brutal pace proves too much Carl eventually, with Negan´s cock continuously hitting his prostate there's just no way for him to last. He cums with a cried out "Negan!", clenching around Negan's cock hard enough to make him stop for a second. 

"Oh, fuck," he growls, gripping Carl's hips and slamming in hard again. And again and again. 

Carl finally heard a muffled moan and felt Negan's body tense over him. 

"Damn ..." 

Negan rolled to the side next to Carl, and Carl took a deep breath. 

So this was sex. 

Negan slowly turned his head to Carl, a satisfied grin on his lips. 

"I hope you liked it ... Because this was damn good sex ..." 

Carl had to laugh. 

"Do you really want me to praise you?" 

Negan shrugged with a laugh and stood up. Carl rolled onto his stomach, watching the naked Negan go to light a cigarette. He could get used to this view, there was no denying it. Carl always knew Negan looked good for his age ... How old was he? 

"Negan?" 

"Yeah?" 

"How old are you?" 

,,Why are you asking?" 

"It just occurred to me that it was a pretty good performance for your age," Carl said teasingly. 

Negan threw a piece of clothing at Carl, which lay on the floor and began to dress himself. 

"Doesn't matter in the end? I think it's clear to both of us that you have no age for anything that happened here. But I think if you can walk around and shoot people, you can fuck whoever you want. " 

These weren't the words Carl wanted to use, but the result was the same. So he just nodded. He liked the feeling of Negan taking him as an adult, no matter how old he might have been. That was, after all, what he wanted from the beginning. For the people around to respect him. Therefore, he left his people, left his family. 

,,You regret it?" 

Negan sat down on the bed next to him, and Carl realized that Negan was talking to him and he wasn't answering, lost in thought. 

,,No! It was ... Damn, you know what it was like, "Carl blushed a little, remembering how good it was." I just ... I remembered the beginning when I left Alexandria. " 

"Yeah, those were golden times ... But I think you'll see your dear dad sooner than you think ..." 

"What do you mean?" Carl asked suspiciously, wrapping a blanket around him. "Did he say anything?" 

Negan was silent for a moment. 

"When we fought, he said some shit about how I kidnapped you. Nothing I haven't heard or expected. I told him mine. Something in the sense that you're no longer his ... " 

Carl had to shake his head at the possessive tone. 

"When he heard that, he hesitated for a moment. I managed to knock him to the ground. And he started blabbering on about not allowing it. Then his men and my men, appeared there and began to fight again. But I think it's clear he wants to save you. " 

Carl considered the information for a moment. He knew that if his father thought of something, he would go for it. Could it be a threat to the people in the factory in the future? Or for him personally? 

"Don't bother with it now," Negan winked, lying back on the bed next to Carl. 

Carl hugged him without hesitation and snuggled closer. 

"Say it one more time," Carl whispered softly. 

"What do you think, darling?" 

Carl smiled at the nickname, hiding from Negan's amused gaze. 

,,You know what I mean..." 

,,I love you..." 

Carl closed his eyes contentedly and gripped Negan's body tightly. 

,,I love you too..."


End file.
